GF tested positive for Chlamydia...Could she be telling the truth?

RandomBlackGuy2 · 4 months

But they were dating then. The doctor would have caught it that july if it was from a previous encounter before they were together. She cheated.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

I have talked to her breifly a couple times. She wont talk to me now because she is afraid of me. (She told him that) This is because I have a sleeve. And she is very conservative, asian, barely speaks proper english. I guess I am scary to her.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

This is not true, since we lived together almost the entire time. I was unemployed for the first 6 months by choice ( I had money, didn't need to be and didn't want to be) I stayed at home. And went to his work and had lunch with him everyday. He hardly even went out without me. And always came home on time. They have exchanged a couple emails about getting property back which he shared with me, she always referenced how they hadn't seen each other at all. I talked to her on the phone after they hung out at the concert and her version was that he called her and begged her to see a show with him and they talked for like 20 minutes. But they both have reason to lie, and I am a los angeles native, mistrustful by nature. I don't think you ever REALLY know somebody.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

I will.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

I have. I thought he was a sociopath for quite a while after this.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

What the fuck? I do not trust him, any time he has asked I have been honest.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

He proposed months ago so I doubt he's marrying me because of the child.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

Texas. I could, but wouldn't need to. Even as a single mom I could afford child care and keep my job.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

I wouldn't ask it, since I make my own money. But without a doubt.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

Maybe my math was wrong, he makes that in a day and a half. And I will be specific, I dont care, I already sent him this post. He is head mobile engineer of his company. Software engineer. He easily makes that much. Since you care enough to ask.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

I think you may have misread something, since he never cheated on either of us. and " "Okay, i'll try again with you, but due to how much you've lied to me in the past, I need us to be completely open about who we're communicating with. I may have some paranoia, but I need you to understand that it's going to take quite a while before my trust is rebuilt.""

that is EXACTLY what I said to him. And he agreed. So I don't understand his refusing this.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

This is true, he makes more than that in a day at work. The problem was the "Oh my ex wants to take a vacation? Sure i'll pay for it!" and never mentioning this to me at all.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

It would not be the path I would have chosen, but sometimes things in life just happen. For better or for worse. Relationship issues aside, I do not have a problem with abortion. And If I wasn't absolutely positive I could financially and emotionally support a child I would not have gone through with the pregnancy. I have been very blessed in life, and what more does a child need than a loving, emotionally supportive parent who can financially give them everything they need and desire? That is what my decision was based on.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

If I left the state they would not be. My home town is california. I have all the friends in the world there and some family as well, but my mom and dad are here an hour and a half away. They think the best place is in the state they are in. They don't seem very empathetic about the fact that I have no friends or near by support. Also, the state i'm in now I have a fantastic job and a drastically cheaper cost of living. It would be emotionally responsible but not fiscally responsible at the moment. They know what's going on, and I suppose they are being old fashioned. I told them don't you think it's better to call off a wedding than be in a messy divorce down the line? They said in this case, it's not. What do they know.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

While everybody has been quite respectful and offering their advice to the best of their abilities, you sir are being an asshole. I came here with an honest question looking for help. You have no right to claim I am not ready for a child. Everybody here knows enough to comment on my relationship, but nobody actually knows ME. Who are you to say I would not be a loving and supportive parent? I have a TON of love to give to my child. I can easily financially support my child and emotionally as well. Insulting my ability to parent is absolutely uncalled for.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

That's what I thought. If he was really sorry and trying to fix things, this would be no problem. UNLESS there was more to hide. Fuck this is so sad.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

I also have no support which makes the emotional aspect of this very hard. I have him, but you can't draw emotional support from the person who hurt you when it's regarding that issue. I am new to where I live, and I have no friends here. I have family over an hour away. It's lonely and it's hard. But that's just me venting. Nothing to do with the marriage thing since that was never a factor in it.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

No I have no support at all. My family and my one friend I have here are over an hour away. I am relatively new to the state I live in. I have no support here. It is incredibly hard and lonely.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

I included a tl;dr

myfiancesucks · 4 months

Okay, yes, you wise son of a bitch. I agree with this as well. Perhaps that is the better question. Any sound worldly advice on how to do so? And trust, the good father, and trust questions have gone through my mind plenty. The only thing I can think of so far is counseling. Every week. No matter how good or bad things are. Sometimes he doesn't seem willing to do this because we went one time right after all of this, and I freaked out and got super mad. But he has to. It is time to grow up. Even if it were a money issue I might understand a little better, but for fucks sake he could buy the entire counseling firm. No excuse there.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

This. I would absolutely be as transparent as possible. It seems to me he makes this out to be a power struggle. " I have nothing to hide I swear! but I dont want to do it because you told me to and threatened me (calling off wedding) If I don't" Wtf? I would swim the fucking ocean for him.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

I also consider it emotional cheating. I know it sucks to say, and I have not stopped crying all day, even more so reading all of this, but even though it sucks for everyone involved it is a much better idea to call off a wedding than to get a divorce.

myfiancesucks · 4 months

You have received my only humble upvote thus far. Nobody on reddit has said it, but I have. I said it over and over when all of this blew up in my face. I guess I just thought that, he never cheated on me, he seemed genuinely sorry for it, and always (with the exception of the above list) treated me like a princess, I figured maybe everyone deserved one chance to fuck up, and redeem themselves. That if I could put this in the past and learn forgiveness, we could move on to great things. Am I incredibly naive? Or is this just the real world, and nobody is perfect?

myfiancesucks · 4 months

Hahaha. Your last line is the first time I've laughed all day. However!! What if you really really wanted to marry this woman, but you had given her a reason not to trust you in the past? And you were trying everything in your heart's power to gain that trust back and marry her. Would you show her the records then?

myfiancesucks · 4 months

No I really can't. I know phone records won't prove to me anything that he said happened in their face to face encounters, but it will at least prove to me he hasn't been texting her our entire relationship. Which I don't think is the case, but what the fuck do I know.

myfiancesucks

TROPHY CASE

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