mrminty

- friends
1,424 link karma
20,515 comment karma
send messageredditor for
what's this?

TROPHY CASE

Reddit, what is a candy that you can't believe anyone actually likes? by VioletBeauregardin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 118 points119 points ago

Does anybody remember those candy dots that came on a giant roll of receipt paper? Your choice was to either consume roughly a pound of paper, or spend 20 minutes carefully and methodically peeling off fragments of paper with your fingernails to eat a tiny piece of candy.

Now that I think about it, it feels more like a half-remembered nightmarish fever dream I had once. There's no way someone marketed candy where eating inedible cellulose along with it was implicit.

Does anyone know what the use of the second, mini pocket in the right hand pocket if jeans is/was used for, and why it was originally put there in the first place? by tomeyoin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 1 point2 points ago

If they're both button flies, you can dock with each other, like gay spaceships!

Reddit, what kind of weird/awesome local characters does the place you live have? by kolinskyin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 1 point2 points ago

If enough Californians move here, yes.

I think that Gatorade tastes better when drank from the squeeze bottle. What most likely scientifically inaccurate belief would you defend to your grave? by day_bowbowin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 1 point2 points ago

I haven't actually eaten it in over a year, but I like to cook sometimes. You can apply the skills you developed making good food to making shitty food.

I think that Gatorade tastes better when drank from the squeeze bottle. What most likely scientifically inaccurate belief would you defend to your grave? by day_bowbowin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 0 points1 point ago

"Sandy" is not a texture I associate with foods that are "delicious", therefore you are wrong.

I think that Gatorade tastes better when drank from the squeeze bottle. What most likely scientifically inaccurate belief would you defend to your grave? by day_bowbowin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 3 points4 points ago

Bull-fucking-shit. The cheese is where you can get creative. While the pasta's sitting in the colander (you did use a colander, right?), pour the milk into the pot you just used, add the butter, and let it heat up and melt. Gently whisk the cheese powder into the pan until you get a smooth, even consistency. Now you can add whatever you desire to the mix, cream cheese, parmesan, more butter, garlic salt, sirircha, you name it. And it'll all come out smooth and clump-free.

Reddit, tell me, what do/did you love about being single? by yukizorain AskReddit

[–]mrminty 1 point2 points ago

...did nobody else wonder why that was Stalin?

my grandfather dug this up in his yard... by HaMMeRxxTiMEin WTF

[–]mrminty 0 points1 point ago

Stoners that subscribe to High Times: What's the deal with the centerfolds? Do you guys... beat off to pictures of weed?

"Oh man, look at those trichomes... oh yeah... damn, you're so dank... you just want me to vape you, don't you... yeah... damn, you're such a sticky little bud..."

"I got this gum from someone else." What white lies do you tell people? by enterapostin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 0 points1 point ago

$4.30 a pack in Texas! Less, if I could be bothered to go farther.

This is not my account. What are the best things you've stumbled across that people have forgotten to log off of? by MyParentsArentHomein AskReddit

[–]mrminty 1 point2 points ago

I had that backfire on me when I was doing just that to a friend of mine, and he later told me that one of the people I added (who accepted) had tried to do some strange sexual things to him when they were kids. Needless to say, that was a tad awkward. Didn't stop me from liking everything in his "recommended pages", though.

Hamilton Pool today by jonhasglassesin Austin

[–]mrminty 0 points1 point ago

Damn Instagram smog. I wish it would just blow away already.

What's the funniest thing you've got in trouble with the police for? by Tomhanksisademonin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 0 points1 point ago

Tagged as Gooch Hammer Tagger.

How does Reddit deal with being single by thomasmturnerin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 0 points1 point ago

Start going to the gym. It helped immensely after I broke up with my ex. Just hop on an elliptical and go for 30 minutes, then get on some weight machines for another 30-45. You'll feel better, you'll just be able to go to bed tired instead of laying awake, you'll look better after about a month or so, and maybe you'll score a rebound out of a hot gym chick. No reason not to go.

American and Chinese Redditors: What would you like to know about each other? by nounclownin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 0 points1 point ago

Makes sense. I'm simply speculating, but it would stand to reason that those wealthy enough to afford a proxy/vpn service have probably benefited from the party in some way, and would therefore not be likely to coordinate things like protests or generally just make trouble for the government. It's the young and poor who have managed to access the internet that you have to worry about.

What are the most/least successful government programs ever implemented in the US? by kingvitamanin PoliticalDiscussion

[–]mrminty 0 points1 point ago

We need this, but for broadband internet.

What's the funniest thing you've got in trouble with the police for? by Tomhanksisademonin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 15 points16 points ago

Gooch it is, then.

What's the funniest thing you've got in trouble with the police for? by Tomhanksisademonin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 21 points22 points ago

Everybody talks about that like it's an amazing feat, but I've been able to stop mid-stream at the drop of a hat my entire life. Maybe it's all the kegeling I do, I can crush a beer can with my taint.

My girlfriend just found out she can't have children and being a guy I have no idea how to comfort her about this can you please help me out here? by ajax_2232in AskReddit

[–]mrminty 12 points13 points ago

Doctors have to cover their own asses, too. By giving the worst case scenario or at least making it look grim, they reduce the chance of a patient taking them to court because the patient misinterpreted "50/50 chance of having a kid/it's near impossible to say because I'm a medical professional, not a fortune teller" as "you will definitely have a child". Better to make it seem as unlikely as possible, but not impossible so nobody gets too litigiously trigger-happy.

What is the most useful tattoo you can think of? by thepandorasin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 2 points3 points ago

Paramedic three: "There's no time for a dilution, I went to Alchemy EMS school, this man needs pure brimstone!"

I feel like a bit of a jerk for not tipping the person who changed the oil in my car. At the same time, don't you think it's BS that big chain companies pressure consumers to tip rather than pay people better wages? by preta6in AskReddit

[–]mrminty 25 points26 points ago

I worked a year for Walmart as a night stocker, and one of the things that I noticed about my third week in was that I was one of the few people working there that wasn't on food stamps. Then I realized that Walmart is essentially letting the government subsidize their ability to offer a wage that isn't even considered livable by federal standards. Absolutely sickened me, but I was locked in the same cycle they were, stuck in an area with few jobs that all paid the same. Thankfully I got out, but working around all of those people trapped in generational cycles of poverty while still working as hard as they could all night and destroying their bodies with bad healthcare was a humbling experience. I wouldn't feel so bad if they were a bunch of asshole rednecks, but I worked with more than a few intelligent people who had fallen on hard times and were doing the best they could with what they had. I was more than a bit of a prick when I started working there, by the end I had become a lot more compassionate. I don't know why I went off on that tangent.

Tl;dr: don't work for Walmart.

I think I love my best friend of four years. Do I make the commitment or just stay a friend? by promarkmanin AskReddit

[–]mrminty 0 points1 point ago

If she's in to you, she would have already made a move. Plain and simple. If she dated guys during the last 4 years, she doesn't have any romantic inclinations towards you. Now, I could be wrong, but that's how I'm interpreting this situation based on only what you've said, and it seems as if she sees you simply as a very close friend. A good friend is harder to come by than a romantic relationship. Maybe, just maybe, feelings will develop on her end, but don't hold your breath.

Downvoting reposts on the front page by auchimin funny

[–]mrminty 0 points1 point ago

Man, I wish Reddit came with a "Summarize .gif" option. Just think, in front of every post, it just said "It's from Arrested Development, where Job throws the letter into the ocean." Think of the time we could save.

Woman in a bar. by mrmintyin Jokes

[–]mrminty[S] 7 points8 points ago

If I hadn't marked it, I would be getting "Hey buddy, that's NSFW" comments instead. Redditors are sensitive.

view more: next