histbasementdweller

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A close friend of mine dropped this after many drinks. by Sarrrrein AdviceAnimals

[–]histbasementdweller 5 points6 points ago

I fall asleep masturbating all the time. After the first couple orgasms you just feel all warm and fuzzy and sleepy. So I often wake up with a plastic dick inside me.

I'm 17 and my mom just technically abandoned me. Is there anything I need to know that can help me. by zzenterin AskReddit

[–]histbasementdweller 4 points5 points ago

This might be the most useful thing I have ever seen on reddit. An upvote for you, sir.

My dog tried to jump over the tree.. by k259in funny

[–]histbasementdweller 18 points19 points ago

That look on his face speaks volumes. "Really?! You're just going to stand there and take a picture with your fucking phone?"

While cleaning the attic, I found this newspaper clipping from when Jurassic Park first came out. by whowantstoknowin movies

[–]histbasementdweller 224 points225 points ago

My mother swore up and down that me and my siblings would NEVER be allowed to go see "that horrible, horrible movie." Luckily my dad was awesome and came home from work to sneak us out of the house and see it while my mom was out buying groceries. He left a note on the fridge: "took kids to the park for exercise."

My dad's a badass.

Playing Wolf 3D for the first time in almost two decades - just minutes in and I realized that I was doing this ... by DocCalibanin gaming

[–]histbasementdweller 4 points5 points ago

I had forgotten how terrifying it is when you open a door and there's a fucking German Shepherd on the other side. "Stop jumping and let me shoot you!" is immediately followed by "Aww it's dead."

Reddit, ever want to knock someone out within the first 5 minutes of meeting them? by Fajitasizzlein AskReddit

[–]histbasementdweller 3 points4 points ago

I hate face pubes...

Reddit, ever want to knock someone out within the first 5 minutes of meeting them? by Fajitasizzlein AskReddit

[–]histbasementdweller 10 points11 points ago

I feel like MOST kids are bastards, actually.

Gynecologists of Reddit, what has been your most disgusting experience? [NSFW] by mrsblueskyin AskReddit

[–]histbasementdweller 1 point2 points ago

Indeed, sir. Indeed.

Teachers do you hate any of your students? by canitazeyou2014in AskReddit

[–]histbasementdweller 0 points1 point ago

I hate most of my students, but I work at a university not a high school. They are mostly obnoxious little fucks that don't do any of the work and then complain endlessly about the grades they are getting. For some reason they don't understand that I don't just "give" them grades, they "earn" those D's. That being said this is mostly an issue with freshman classes, not the uppers. Freshman are douchebags.

Gynecologists of Reddit, what has been your most disgusting experience? [NSFW] by mrsblueskyin AskReddit

[–]histbasementdweller 2 points3 points ago

Part One: Girl climbs in dumpster and puts maggots inside her, leaves them for several days, gets all manner of horrible infections, ruins her baby-making parts.

Part Two: Same girl sees dead, rotting deer on the side of the road, decides she must fuck it, shoved its maggots back where they don't belong drives home, infections ensue.

Moral of Story: Girl has serious self-hatred issues due to childhood abuse, and gets off on giving herself nasty infections.

You know how when you get older you can tell you parents about all the stupid stuff you did as a kid...what's the one thing that you'll never tell them? by theraf8100in AskReddit

[–]histbasementdweller 0 points1 point ago

You so stooooopid!

Bop It! (A Capella style) by cookie_cutterin videos

[–]histbasementdweller 0 points1 point ago

It's like a medley of the nineties!

Is a male with child the new Driving While Black? by krackenmorein AskReddit

[–]histbasementdweller 17 points18 points ago

I feel like half of these people did not actually click on OP's links. This guy is disgusting. Thank you for pointing this out. I wish I had more upvotes for you.

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Meatwad is tired of grading exams. (imgur.com)

submitted ago by histbasementdweller to pics

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Meatwad is just as tired of grading exams as I am (imgur.com)

submitted ago by histbasementdweller

What jobs are there for people with history degrees outside the field of education? by imonlyredditing41dayin history

[–]histbasementdweller 0 points1 point ago

Just coming out of the job market I can tell you that the fact of the matter is this: nobody in academia gives a shit about what the requirements or the recommendations for teaching actually are. If someone wants you, they will make shit up to get you, and a Master's in History not only makes you more attractive, it will make you infinitely more prepared to teach history than one in Education. I cannot stress that enough.

What jobs are there for people with history degrees outside the field of education? by imonlyredditing41dayin history

[–]histbasementdweller 3 points4 points ago

If you want to teach eventually you would be better off with a Master's in History rather than Education. Trust me.

I'm a moderately attractive person despite the fact that I have a mono-brow. I know that removing the excess brow-age would increase my attraction exponentially, but I refuse to do it out of sheer principle. What's your easily fixable flaw that you think other's should be able to look past? by MamesJathiesonin AskReddit

[–]histbasementdweller 0 points1 point ago

I have a big swath of silver hair on the left side of my head. It stands out in my dark, dark brown hair, and everyone I know canNOT understand why I won't color it. But I kinda like it!

Glad to see I'm not the only one whose amused that my ex's new relationship is going down the toilet by johnny_b_rottenin facepalm

[–]histbasementdweller 1 point2 points ago

*Who's

TIL that Glenn Close is the pirate who got put into the "boo box" in the movie Hook. by glovesoff11in todayilearned

[–]histbasementdweller 0 points1 point ago

My brother and I used to put our little brother in a homemade "boo" box (it was a toy chest) and then we would drop little plastic snakes and spiders in there and he would scream hysterically like he was getting eaten.

Any movie that you find/found scary or disturbing that most other people don't? by jam3zzin movies

[–]histbasementdweller 1 point2 points ago

This. Just thinking about that movie scares the shit outta me.

Formation of a chicken inside a incubator, without the egg shell by Kalatnikovin WTF

[–]histbasementdweller 0 points1 point ago

Random chicken anecdote: I hatched 17 eggs in a homemade incubator in high school. It takes a lot of time and effort, but watching them all hatch at the same time was worth it. When they get their little heads out they start eating immediately; don't even wait to finish getting out of the egg, just gobble, gobble.

This jerk...just sleeping on my face... by weighawesomein aww

[–]histbasementdweller 134 points135 points ago

I would sit on your face too...

Christian Nation by Bennyboy1337in atheism

[–]histbasementdweller 0 points1 point ago

He's saying Native Americans had nothing to do with creating this nation. He is right. Your post, though well meaning, does not make any sense. North America does not equal the United States of America. The word "nation" is your downfall here.

What's your worst "oh shit, I just did/said that in front of a kid" moment? by LumpyDogin AskReddit

[–]histbasementdweller 1 point2 points ago

I don't know why the knowledge that your parents have sex is so inherently disturbing...but it is.

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