IamA woman with genital HSV-1. With so many incorrect theories out there about herpes, I'd like to give you some real answers. AMA.

beehave · 3 months

i just said that i don't know for sure that there aren't people who can't automatically fight off the virus but with it affecting as much as 80% of the population, i'm very comfortable saying that that's not the case with most people

beehave · 3 months

i mean, i'm sure there's the possibility that there are people who are totally immune to the virus, but i'm talking about the general population. most people's bodies don't automatically fight it off completely.

beehave · 3 months

i wasn't as mature about him as i could have been. i assume that he knew he had the virus because he had cold sores, so i never said anything to him. he tried to talk to me a few times after i got the virus [he didn't say anything about it, he just wanted to see me again], but i ignored him. i just didn't want anything to do with him and i didn't want to call him out on it for fear of him telling other people that i had it. i haven't spoken to him in years. we were both young and stupid. i should have paid more attention and he should have said something first. we both made mistakes and i don't hold any resentment toward him now.

beehave · 3 months

because you have type 2, i would definitely consider taking a suppressant, since that virus is easier to spread genitally. you have a much higher chance of spreading the virus during the first year, but that does go down as time goes on. definitely use protection and refrain from sex if you feel any kind of itching, tingling, or burning just in case. from what i've learned over the years, these viruses are much less contagious than what middle school gossip has lead most of us to believe

beehave · 3 months

there's always that possibility, but i would think that it's fairly hard to spread from that area. also, are you sure that she has hsv1 or hsv2? herpes is also the virus behind shingles and chicken pox, so i'm wondering if your girlfriend has shingles and her doctor just didn't explain it in layman's terms.

beehave · 3 months

warts are a symptom of hpv, not hsv. talk to your doctor again and maybe get retested. if you're diagnosed with hsv they'll always tell you which type you have.

beehave · 3 months

there is no cure for herpes so yes, you have it for life. condoms don't provide full protection because they don't cover the entire affected area.

beehave · 3 months

genital hsv1 is harder to pass on because it's considerably weakened. hsv2 is spread more because those who have it shed the virus more often.

beehave · 3 months

i just think about the fact that i used to be ignorant too. unless you have it, you aren't going to do a ton of research about it or think about it too seriously. it's one of those things that people talk about with the mindset of "it'll never happen to me", so it's easy for to make jokes about it. i'm sure i made a few jokes about it before i got it and i bet your girlfriend diid too. just remind her that it's only out of ignorance.

beehave · 3 months

i don't know as much about herpes in other areas of the body, but i would assume that the virus is much weaker outside of its "normal" places. like with oral or genital herpes, i wouldn't suggest skin on skin contact during an outbreak. other than that, it should be pretty safe, especially since she's on medication.

beehave · 3 months

i got it because someone with a cold sore went down on me.

beehave · 3 months

for both scenarios it's possible to spread the virus without having an outbreak. it's very unlikely though.

beehave · 3 months

this past christmas marked 8 years.

beehave · 3 months

if there's any broken skin then there's the possibility of transmitting it. honestly, I wouldn't worry. the fact that you have so few outbreaks is a sign that you don't shed the virus very often. you really only need to worry about it when you have a cold sore.

beehave · 3 months

you can only have a skin test if there are symptoms present. he's never had any symptoms so he had a blood test. you should get a blood test. i don't know how it won't tell you if you're capable of spreading it or not because if you have the virus, you can spread it no matter what.

beehave · 3 months

yep, not gonna lie. out of the 15 or so people i've slept with, most of them have been after i was exposed to the virus.

beehave · 3 months

hoe? not quite sure what this is supposed to translate to. once it was clear that we wanted to go further, i would stop the action and basically say "before we do anything else, i need you to know that i have genital hsv1 and blah blah facts, etc". then i would answer any questions they had. nervewracking, but it's always turned out to be a good thing.

beehave · 3 months

you would cry too.

beehave · 3 months

yes it would. but like so many of the people who have posted below have said, the stigma is worse than the disease itself and that's really what i want people to get out of this.

beehave · 3 months

being honest and ready to answer any questions my partners have has worked well for me. not a single partner has changed his or her mind about sleeping with me after i explained everything. this isn't the end of your love life. just go get tested and find out if you really have any reason to worry!

beehave · 3 months

say i live 95 years from the time i contracted the virus. what's 5% of 95 years? idk, it's 5 in the morning and i don't feel like doing the math. but you get the idea.

beehave · 3 months

i can take a joke. but if something really rude is said then i generally just shrug it off.
i'm lucky to have several very close friends that i was comfortable discussing it with, but most of my friends don't know. the disease doesn't make me who i am so i don't want to be judged by it.
my friends know i have a sense of humor and that they don't need to sensor themselves around me. because of my herpes, they're much more conscious about protection, etc, but they're also a lot more open minded.

beehave · 3 months

not quite. genital hsv1 has such a low risk factor because it's not designed to infect the genitals. hsv2 is however, so it's much more likely to spread.

beehave · 3 months

hmmm... i don't know the exact number but i would say somewhere between 9 and 11

beehave · 3 months

exactly. ones you get past the prepubescent horror stories, it's not bad.

beehave

TROPHY CASE

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