averagenameguy

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What is your most useless skill? by mnelawarin AskReddit

[–]averagenameguy 0 points1 point ago

I am incredible at the "Extreme Bop-It!" toy thingy

Your brain deceives you by Myst23in funny

[–]averagenameguy -3 points-2 points ago

False! a "perfectly round circle" is a mathematical concept and can not actually be drawn... so it is not my brain that deceives me but rather the very audacity of the subtext of this graphic.

RUN! RUN FOREST RUN! by colberin funny

[–]averagenameguy 0 points1 point ago

it is a baby Ent

Soda on a Coin (x/post from r/itookapicture) by denniedarkoin pics

[–]averagenameguy 0 points1 point ago

looks like the city from Inception.

Can you spot the IT consultant? by [deleted]in funny

[–]averagenameguy 39 points40 points ago

look at their eyes- he is the only one with a spark of life and humor in his. I bet he works in that button down soul trap of an office and just laughs his ass off at the absurd parade of conformity around him... ok, sorry rant over...

I submit this for scientific research by mhizzlein AdviceAnimals

[–]averagenameguy 1 point2 points ago

that must be why gay men always have fabulous hair; an increased exposure to penis...

S**t Just Got Real by natesirrahin AdviceAnimals

[–]averagenameguy 0 points1 point ago

my grandma could beat up your dad

My roommate just got back. by redwings27in AdviceAnimals

[–]averagenameguy -1 points0 points ago

you should be the Bill O'rielly of room mates- FUCK IT i'll just pee with the door open.

Am I an asshole, for getting frustrated with the new guy at work who is 50+ years of age and is really slow with technology? by GeoRhiin AskReddit

[–]averagenameguy 0 points1 point ago

in a nut shell, "yes" be as patient and as kind as you can possibly be... but if you find out he is secretly a hipster then you can kill him.

Volleyball match across the US/Mexico border in 1979. by MyPeadyPiein pics

[–]averagenameguy 0 points1 point ago

All right, I can see we are going to have to take this deep;

Open the Google tool bar and select the Translate tool-

In English type in "Fountain of Unfunny" translate that into Gujarati- enter the translated Gujarati text into the Google search bar.

Here is your red pill, blue pill moment. A single link will pop up. If you click on this link a single word will appear. If you read this word you will never be funny to anyone else again. But the curse does not stop there, in a twist of fate you will still consider yourself to be funny but merely misunderstood. You will spend the remainder of your days haunting the pages of Reddit collecting nothing but down votes and scorn.

Your dog will also hate you and your Mother will stop calling you.

Choose wisely!

Volleyball match across the US/Mexico border in 1979. by MyPeadyPiein pics

[–]averagenameguy 1 point2 points ago

maybe refine your search to "painfully unfunny." Alot of my best work pops up there too

Volleyball match across the US/Mexico border in 1979. by MyPeadyPiein pics

[–]averagenameguy 1 point2 points ago

No, they were being closely observed by the CIA. There is a Nicholas Cage movie coming out about it this summer. He is playing both the investigating CIA agent and the Volley Ball.

I am calling an Oscar nomination right now!

Volleyball match across the US/Mexico border in 1979. by MyPeadyPiein pics

[–]averagenameguy 3 points4 points ago

you should have also found a link to every submission I have ever submitted to /r/funny

Volleyball match across the US/Mexico border in 1979. by MyPeadyPiein pics

[–]averagenameguy 30 points31 points ago

if you Google "unsuccessful attempt at humor" you will find my source.

Volleyball match across the US/Mexico border in 1979. by MyPeadyPiein pics

[–]averagenameguy -12 points-11 points ago

Actually this was a clever ploy to smuggle kilos of cocaine into the US. The drugs were hidden inside the volley ball and the balls were quickly switched during the game. Google it, it is a fascinating story.

little known cat fact by drtchockin pics

[–]averagenameguy 27 points28 points ago

Little known cat fact: if your cat was 40lb larger and even a little hungry it would not hesitate to eat you... alive... feet first... as you screamed and tweeted about it

/r/AskReddit, I'm a healthy, fit, young man that gets a cold almost every week for the last 2 years. My doctors have no clue what this is from, and I'm desperately in need of a solution. Can you please help me? (PLEASE upvote--no karma, I just want to get as much advice as possible!) by RationalArgumentManin AskReddit

[–]averagenameguy 0 points1 point ago

This is not the same situation but it might be relevant to you. I am the father of two little germ vectors and I got tired of constantly catching whatever it was they brought home that day.

I switched my diet and began a regimen if Kale shakes for breakfast. These shakes coupled with exercise (I am a strong proponent of exercise for general well being) have kept me sickness free for the last year.

You will need a very good blender for this drink and here is the recipe:

A large slice if ginger 1/6 of a lemon two carrots an orange- with a knife shave the orange colored peal off and keep as much of the "white peal" as possible 1/4 cup flax seed 1/2 a banana 1" thick slice of pineapple a handful of blue berries an entire bundle of Kale Top off with water- makes about 3qts Note- if you want the drink a littler sweeter add a scope or two of orange juice concentrate. Best of luck to you!

Get in my guard... TUF audition by sterlingsinnerin bjj

[–]averagenameguy 1 point2 points ago

heart rate is easily 250...

Get in my guard... TUF audition by sterlingsinnerin bjj

[–]averagenameguy 0 points1 point ago

YESSSSSS!!!!!!! This guy!!!!!!!!!!!!

Watch out! We got a bad ass over here! (NSFW) by Grimmlochin videos

[–]averagenameguy 1 point2 points ago

First off those are the puppies from 101 Dalmatians on the wall in the back ground- which is either incredibly ironic or incredibly Gansta. Secondly, it appears he has disconnected his smoke detector which is ill advised and dangerous even for a cold blooded killer such as himself.

What was the first submission you have learned? by dtleonardoin bjj

[–]averagenameguy -2 points-1 points ago

Rape Choke... and then I had to go away for a little while... and then I learn North/South

Judo Update... by averagenameguyin judo

[–]averagenameguy[S] 0 points1 point ago

Spent two hours going deep down the Judo rabbit hole last night based on your recommendations! Illiadis is pure savagery, Riner's a brute off that reach over grip and Wang is judo poetry in motion. Watched a video of Illiadas and Riner training together; you could really see that Illiadas is on another level in the video and at the end he buries Riner. Anyways, thanks for that. Best of luck with your training and competitive pursuits- and post some of your videos already!

Judo Update... by averagenameguyin judo

[–]averagenameguy[S] 2 points3 points ago

What do you think of that? I always thought the Judo community could be a bit nepotistic and would benefit by allowing these cross over techniques

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