stumbled upon this gem in a book i found in my attic closet... nsfw

ooglethorp · 2012-05-24T08:33:34.221741+00:00

I'm not sure. Maybe cos i have a short attention span, or maybe because mis-sentence I got aroused causing a rush of blood from one head to another.

ooglethorp · 2012-05-24T05:12:22.898166+00:00

That sentence made me dizzy.

ooglethorp · 2012-05-24T05:06:39.258650+00:00

I thought you were saying some babies smell like tuna fish and bad cheese. Ha.

BTW, I've never experienced this. Are there really women with off smelling heavenholes out there?

ooglethorp · 2012-05-23T22:04:48.534381-07:00

What? Are you crazy? It is so rude to talk about your penis as if it can't hear you. When I stare at my cock it's more like "Oh hey man, hows things? Yeah, later. Oh, great work last night by the way, really pulled through there. Later I said! And yes, I'll trim you tomorrow, if that's cool? Later! Christ, leave it bro. Oh before I zip you away, just wanted to say, you are a beautiful creature and I can't thank you enough for existing."

ooglethorp · 2012-05-24T05:00:41.991308+00:00

I'm strangely offended by this. On behalf of all men, please stop taking potshots at our pride!

ooglethorp · 2012-05-24T04:58:42.997729+00:00

Dude, black and white that shit and have it written on the t-shirt of a semi-nude teenage girl wearing fake ray-ban specs, then you got some tumblr gear.

rdahm · 1 day

I suspect maybe the teacher asked them to draw those thank you cards. Still, pretty awesome.

drPre · 1 day

Sometimes I don't understand Reddit. Why am I looking at this?

ComingUpMilhouse · 1 day

Seriously? He even says at some point "oh, that's right, you want me to be controversial!"

It seemed to me very likely that the whole thing was supposed to go off the rails.

Still, Shaun is awesome.

soy_en_fuego · 1 day

like that film AntiTrust. Oh shit, there's a camera in my room, isn't there? MURDER.

DetroitGinger · 2 days

What if they are trying to keep you down?

buletime · 2 days

Not the Pheonix, unfortunately. He ain't ever comin back.

kusahafiez · 2 days

Welcome to Melbourne.

I once got back from 6 months in Japan, and the airport was like a confusing nightmare for me. I was so used to things working that I was utterly baffled when I tried to dry my hands and the dryer just wouldn't come on. After some deliberation I kind of went "ohhhh, yeah, Melbourne... that's right, shit doesn't work here."

I then had to make a phone call using the pay phones in the airport. It took me six - SIX no less! - pay phones until I found one that worked. Unbelievable.

Rule of thumb: if it's a thing, and it's in Melbourne, it probably doesn't work.

palsi · 3 days

It's good man. I didn't really pick up anything wrong. The ampersand symbols rather than word "and" is strange, but I'm sure you have your reasons.

I might mention that I didn't know the whole time I read the thing what the point of it was. (I read it before I read your description above).

sburns127 · 3 days

You're doing great!

zintuplet · 6 days

Go out in public and see how much masturbation u can get away with. Try it in a cinema.

webibiz · 7 days

Touche. I feel like pringles...

meatwad75892 · 8 days

is it though? I mean who uses mousepads? Between having a wireless mouse that can go anywhere on your desk, and having a laser tracker, do people still use mousepads?

I_Am_Coder · 10 days

Every time I get lucid I just go Neo, and fucking fly straight up, then wake up while I zoom upward.

emnemz · 11 days

I think one of your kids might not be one of your kids...

SteppedOnLegos · 15 days

Okay, for a while there I thought I knew... but apparently I don't. What the fuck does troll mean?

hunterlaker · 15 days

I was browsing books in a very quiet bookstore and there was a lady with a probably 4 year old boy. Very loudly, the kid asked: "Mum, will you suck on my toes?"

She shushed him and was all embarrassed and looked at me very awkwardly. To be honest I was just relieved that the sentence had ended with the word toes.

sleep_well · 15 days

Hanging out, meeting new people, eating, learning about other peoples interests... I don't drink but I do hang out in bars and that kinda club rat scene a lot, dno how that came about. I write (novels), but that isn't really an interest, more a career. I'll come with you to a game or a sailing thing or some shit and u can teach me all about it. Sound fun?

BleedTheFreaks · 16 days

How many more times is this going to work before reddit clues on? Cos my ummm dad... is releasing a novel soon! Oh I want my dad to sell heaps of his book!

sleep_well · 16 days

I share none of your interestes. Which I think is perfect! Internet fist bump?

BearPond

TROPHY CASE

BearPond

TROPHY CASE

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