this post was submitted on 10 Mar 2010
44 points (63% like it)
105 up votes 61 down votes
all 165 comments

[deleted] 42 points43 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Neutral. I believe in Nothing!

yossarian 10 points11 points 6 months ago[-]

Me too. "Say what you want about the tenants of National Socialism..."

Robopuppy 9 points10 points 6 months ago[-]

Same, and it's what I always play too. I'm not slaughtering these peasants for personal gain, I'm doing it because it's funny.

Glenn_Beck 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

You peasants really do pull a lot of hilarious expressions when you're placed under the boot.

NotSpartacus 4 points5 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Neutral

A chaotic neutral character follows his whims. He is an individualist first and last. He values his own liberty but doesn’t strive to protect others’ freedom. He avoids authority, resents restrictions, and challenges traditions. The chaotic neutral character does not intentionally disrupt organizations as part of a campaign of anarchy. To do so, he would have to be motivated either by good (and a desire to liberate others) or evil (and a desire to make those different from himself suffer). The common phrase for chaotic neutral is "true chaotic." Remember that the chaotic neutral character may be unpredictable, but his behavior is not totally random. He is not as likely to jump off a bridge as to cross it. Chaotic neutral is the best alignment you can be because it represents true freedom both from society’s restrictions and from a do-gooder’s zeal.

Erfeo 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

me too, Would have guessed chaotic good though

thepensivepoet 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Same here.

microsofat 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Give us ze money, or ve cut off your chonson!

bigwangbowski 0 points1 point 6 months ago[-]

You want mercy? I'm chaotic neutral!

fireflash38 39 points40 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Good.

mikemcg 11 points12 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Good! I figured I'd either get that or Chaotic Good.

RyanForT3hWin 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

I had the same. I always play (played) chaotic good, as I thought it would fit me better. Little did I know!

linz0rz 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Same here. I always make myself out to be such an asshole, and I pride myself in it, but I guess not. :)

asev0 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

I always play chaotic good (chaotic is more fun!), but I got Neutral Good.

razzark666 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

I've taken a couple before and I always get Neutral Good or Chaotic Good

Ashex 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I got the same although during game I'm a really bitter twisted person.

rybl 35 points36 points 6 months ago[-]

How do you view lifelong commitment to a single romantic partner?

I love how " I'm waiting to find such a romance" is an option, but "I have already found one" is not. They know us too well.

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 15 points16 points 6 months ago[-]

Hahaha. My girlfriend pointed that out, too. :)

jaxspider 20 points21 points 6 months ago[-]

Hahaha. My girlfriend pointed that out, too. :)

I like how you keep rubbing it in. Btw, does she still make cookies?

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 13 points14 points 6 months ago[-]

Uh... We just ate homemade sushi and chocolate-covered pretzels. I'm so fucking lucky.

fobxor 5 points6 points 6 months ago[-]

Bah! She never made me sushi! Serves me right for loving her unconscious.

antifreze 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

I read this twice, and yep, it still disturbs me.

bananabelle 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

buddhafig 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that. -Mitch Hedberg.

newborn 33 points34 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral.

How positively boring I am.

DrJulianBashir 8 points9 points 6 months ago[-]

What makes a man turn neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?

Dr_Kabong 7 points8 points 6 months ago[-]

The Dude abides.

aaneton 4 points5 points 6 months ago[-]

Me also.

400vinestreet 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

Same here.

esotericguy 6 points7 points 6 months ago[-]

Tell my wife I said: "Hello".

(also neutral)

elquesogrande 4 points5 points 6 months ago[-]

True Neutral. Thought it was boring until I saw this.

Semenantics 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

I reckon you'd be a Huffelpuff if you took the Harry Potter sorting hat quiz (I am too, its alright)

Wo1ke 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I'm true neutral and Slytherin.

moroder 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

trunuhuffpuff right here

ephemerat 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral here, too. But, having just checked on one of those entirely trustworthy online sorting hats, came up Ravenclaw for my Hogwart's house. The sorting hat never lies, right?

giga 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral is the best alignment you can be because it means you act naturally, without prejudice or compulsion.

We are the best.

Taaniel 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Wiiiiii, but who are we to say that we are the best.

wumps 21 points22 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Evil. I've never even thrown a punch in my whole life.

What the heck?

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 36 points37 points 6 months ago[-]

Maybe you should start?

UlquiorraSchiffer 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Right there with you, though I've thrown plenty of punches...

daaargh 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Oh how I lol'd. You should do an AMA :D

DoublePlusMediocre 17 points18 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Good

A chaotic good character acts as his conscience directs him with little regard for what others expect of him. He makes his own way, but he’s kind and benevolent. He believes in goodness and right but has little use for laws and regulations. He hates it when people try to intimidate others and tell them what to do. He follows his own moral compass, which, although good, may not agree with that of society. Chaotic good is the best alignment you can be because it combines a good heart with a free spirit.

That's about right.

faultydesign 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

You and me both.

BCTC 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Me too. I'm sure I got plenty of points on the authority of leadership questions...

theonusta 15 points16 points 6 months ago[-]

I'm Lawful Neutral - never done D&D but my boyfriend has talked about it a lot since he used to play with his friends.

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 8 points9 points 6 months ago[-]

Well, tell him about your rating and get him all hot and bothered!

theonusta 6 points7 points 6 months ago[-]

I have no idea why that would get him hot and bothered, but it sounds like fun so I'll give it a try. :P

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

It may not, but I have a feeling it will. I was also a geeky high school guy.

yellowking 13 points14 points 6 months ago[-]

I was a geeky high school guy, and a girl breathing got me hot and bothered. If she mentioned she'd taken an online D&D alignment quiz I probably would have passed out from blood loss.

LinuxFreeOrDie 5 points6 points 6 months ago[-]

Yeah but lawful neutral?

theonusta 5 points6 points 6 months ago[-]

I'll definitly give it a shot. :P

umilmi81 4 points5 points 6 months ago[-]

+1 for Lawful Neutral

batttygirl 0 points1 point 6 months ago[-]

same here. not very exciting, huh? I was thinking Chaotic good, which is what I usually get.

kroneland 0 points1 point 6 months ago[-]

I got the same thing. Here's to being boring and by the book.

Epic_Chicken 9 points10 points 6 months ago* [-]

Lawful Good

A lawful good character acts as a good person is expected or required to act. She combines a commitment to oppose evil with the discipline to fight relentlessly. She tells the truth, keeps her word, helps those in need, and speaks out against injustice. A lawful good character hates to see the guilty go unpunished. Lawful good is the best alignment you can be because it combines honor and compassion.

Edit: Formatting.

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 7 points8 points 6 months ago[-]

A.k.a., Goody two-shoes. ;P

Epic_Chicken 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Haha, yep...definitely not the first time I've been called that. LG seems to be a good fit for me.

razorsoup 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

Lawful Good

Me too.

Sabaron 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

Reddit paladins, unite! Seriously, we're outnumbered pretty badly. :(

lukjad007 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Sadly, this is so.

lukjad007 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Same here: Lawful Good

[deleted] 0 points1 point 6 months ago[-]

Me too!

EFG 9 points10 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral. Evil.

utore 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

The common phrase for neutral evil is "true evil." Neutral evil is the most dangerous alignment because it represents pure evil without honor and without variation.

Woohoo for us!

EFG 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

I'm oddly comfortable with that.

noph 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I always suspected but I could never say for sure.

cweaver 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

I got that too, and my first thought was, "Are there really schmucks out there who answer these questions differently than I did?"

Now I'm kinda worried about myself.

Pappenheimer 7 points8 points 6 months ago[-]

Lawful good, but only because I lied. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 10 points11 points 6 months ago[-]

So.... Chaotic Neutral maybe?

Pappenheimer 10 points11 points 6 months ago* [-]

No, I consider myself chaotic good and "lawful good" is highly embarrassing. I think there are quite some options missing for a chaotic good character. Would I plot to kill my king? I sure would, but only if, after careful consideration, I had come to the conclusion that his rulings severely threaten the community. Sadly, that was not an option!

Edit: Maybe 'careful consideration' isn't chaotic enough.

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 12 points13 points 6 months ago[-]

I think it probably sensed that you were German and knew that you liked rules and paperwork, hence the "lawful." :P

Pappenheimer 10 points11 points 6 months ago[-]

ಠ_ಠ

kawarazu 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

:D

linz0rz 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

:3

YesImSardonic 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I'm with you here. Many of my actions depend on who I'm interacting with--such options were not and could not be explored with a simple four-answers-per-query quiz.

G3R4 8 points9 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Good.

"A neutral good character does the best that a good person can do. He is devoted to helping others. He works with kings and magistrates but does not feel beholden to them. The common phrase for neutral good is "true good." Neutral good is the best alignment you can be because it means doing what is good without bias toward or against order."

arkasha 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Same here, but only because the were missing options for a lot of the questions. I would absolutely kill the king, only if having him dead would make the lives of his subjects better.

G3R4 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

A few weren't exact for me, but oh well. I'd probably have strayed further toward Chaotic Good if given slightly different options.

pinderschmit 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Me too. Have to admit I'm perfectly happy with that assessment.

fetusburgers 4 points5 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Evil.

Apparently I'm the most dangerous alignment. This is how I play so yay!

deviantpdx 5 points6 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Evil

nwalker85 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Same here. And I thought I was going for chaotic good. i learned something about myself today.

Thickas2 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Yeah, I knew I was going to get neutral, but the evil part was unexpected, but not all that surprising.

[deleted] 4 points5 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Evil. Woop woop.

KingOfZalo 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral

A neutral character does what seems to be a good idea. She doesn’t feel strongly one way or the other when it comes to good vs. evil or law vs. chaos.

rugbysuperstar 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Evil - don't give a shit about morals and traditions, and will do whatever is necessary to prosper: even if it means fucking a few people over.

trypx 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Evil, but I love playing chaotic neutral.

aboutblank2264 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

Took the test twice and got the same result. I guess I'm truly Neutral

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 4 points5 points 6 months ago[-]

Your username is "about:blank"; what did you expect?! :P

jaxspider 5 points6 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Evil

A chaotic evil character does whatever his greed, hatred, and lust for destruction drive him to do. He is hot-tempered, vicious, arbitrarily violent, and unpredictable. If simply out for whatever he can get, he is ruthless and brutal. If he is committed to the spread of evil and chaos, he is even worse. Thankfully, his plans are haphazard, and any groups he joins or forms are poorly organized. Typically, chaotic evil people can only be made to work together by force, and their leader lasts only as long as he can thwart attempts to topple or assassinate him. The demented sorcerer pursuing mad schemes of vengeance and havoc is chaotic evil. Chaotic evil is sometimes called "demonic" because demons are the epitome of chaotic evil. Chaotic evil is the most dangerous alignment because it represents the destruction not only of beauty and life but of the order on which beauty and life depend.

This proves I'm a super villain!

redtaboo 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

I knew it!!! A lazy super villain!!!!

jaxspider 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

That is exactly why none of my plans work. I keep putting them off for some other time.

redtaboo 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

You need a new costume, nothing like a good pair of tights for motivation.

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Wow, no shit. That's kind of awesome. Now you need an outfit, a name, and a secret lair.

jaxspider 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I live in a bachelor pad.

  • Secret Lair Check

Username is JaxSpider for 10 years

  • Name Check

This is me naked.

  • Outfit Check

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

So, you're some sort of... Spider-man... ?

SnarleyJoe 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

I got Chaotic Good, which sounds about right.

panders 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

If only there were more options. I'd like to answer the first question with "move across continent." Anyway, I answered the best I could with limited options. Overall it was fun. Predictably (to myself anyway), I'm Neutral Good.

jeremybub 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Good. Die all ye retched scum!

gonzo_ID 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Neutral. Worryingly accurate.

diminoten 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I'll only take this if you <insert something someone does to another person's Farmville>.

kawarazu 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Good almost always.

WhenHarryMetLassy 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Good. Always the way I play my characters in computer RPGs. I'm going to see if I can get any of my friends to play some D&D with me soon, I have never tried.

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

I've never really played D&D, either. I'm intrigued, I must admit. But I don't have anyone to play with me!

admiral-zombie 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Have you ever betrayed a friend?

This is a tough one. I've played many strategy/diplomacy games where I'll form an alliance of sorts, and then backstab them later so that I can win. But these are games and not serious...right?

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Yeah, as a game—where the stated objective is to win—it doesn't count. If you see life as a game, and backstab people for your own gain, then that would be a clear betrayal.

marshmallowlolita 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I'm Lawful Good. Apparently I conform. Haha.

Posarius 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Neutral...seems about right

sli 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Oh Jesus, I got chaotic evil.

Awesome!

ventomareiro 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

"Chaotic good is the best alignment you can be because it combines a good heart with a free spirit."

I like this!

Sgt_Toadstool 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic good. That's just about all the dorkiness I can handle today--see you all tomorrow!

Morgmeat 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Good! Yay!

playingontheseashore 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Lawlful Good...

theonusta 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I've noticed there are no lawful evils out there. My boyfriend used to play with a friend of his that was lawful evil....just curious.

aji23 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

True Neutral here.

AligaTC 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Good :)

coppersink 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

True Neutral. I feel so beige.

Suppy 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I'm chaotic neutral, apparently.

BenedictKenny 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I have a horrible reputation on Reddit, And...

"Based on your answers to the quiz, your character’s most likely alignment is Chaotic Evil."

yellowking 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

True Neutral.

...although I hate to disappoint everybody-- the latest edition of D&D did away with most of these alignments!!

Buckwheat469 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Lawful Good. That's about right.

Up2Eleven 2 points3 points 6 months ago* [-]

You didn't find some of these questions on OKCupid, by any chance? I swear I've answered several of these and they're almost verbatim.

Not saying it's a bad thing, but just noticed.

Edit: I read the text more carefully, you didn't design the test. But, the folks who did didn't invent their own questions.

Morgmeat 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

While this specific test might have similarly styled questions, finding your alignment in D&D has been around much much longer than OK Cupid.

Up2Eleven 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

That makes sense. I found it interesting that the alignment I tended to use most was what I got on the test: Chaotic Neutral

spaceghoti 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

When I took it, I was Lawful Evil. I was bummed. I was hoping for Chaotic.

Daakuryu 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Neutral

michaelemily 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

lawful neutral. I'm always characterized as the goody-two-shoes. I just can't seem to break out of that innocent, always follow the rules trend.

400vinestreet 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Does anyone have similar links to quizzes like this?

simianfarmer 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Neutral.

Apparently I'm not as predictable as I thought I was.

bowling4meth 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Evil. Kind of mirrors my KotoR experience...

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Is there a test for that?

bowling4meth -3 points-2 points 6 months ago[-]

There is, right here

rugbysuperstar 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Nice try. It would have been better to disguise that link.

tejmin 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Good

A neutral good character does the best that a good person can do. He is devoted to helping others. He works with kings and magistrates but does not feel beholden to them. The common phrase for neutral good is "true good." Neutral good is the best alignment you can be because it means doing what is good without bias toward or against order.

Awesome!

pinderschmit 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Are they gonna hurt us, Walter?

tejmin 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Lights cigar.

Nope.

celticagent 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Good here lol. My older brother was a D&D master in HS (1973). My characters were always neutral or neutral good with a few Paladins thrown in here and there.

Wintermutemancer 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

You like to wear beige, too?

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

My favorite color is brown. :/

ephemerat 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Yeah, and when I get into water it's neither hot nor cold.

discord 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I got Chaotic Evil. I always thought of myself as nice person. Perhaps, I'm not! hahah

rybl 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

No, I definitely read that as an evil laugh.

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Well, you're a nice person to yourself! You just have different values. ;)

dtardif 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

I believe I'm CN, but I always roleplay as CG. Wishful thinking?

lameth 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Depending on how good the test it, I'm usually either CG or CN. I can at times have selfish tendancies, but overall I'm a very giving person who may or may not respect the law.

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 0 points1 point 6 months ago[-]

It seems there's a few chaotics in this thread so far. Interesting. :)

sandity 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Site blocked at work, but after much discussion with my wife over the years, we've decided that I'm chaotic good. I favor individuals over laws when sensible, free will if it doesn't hurt anybody else and have a somewhat situational moral code.

redtaboo 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Good

....

seems boring :/

bhal123 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Lawful Neutral

A lawful neutral character acts as law, tradition, or a personal code directs her. Order and organization are paramount to her. She may believe in personal order and live by a code or standard, or she may believe in order for all and favor a strong, organized government. The common phrase for lawful neutral is "true lawful." Lawful neutral is the best alignment you can be because it means you are reliable and honorable without being a zealot.

--excerpted from the Player’s Handbook, Chapter 6

discord 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Is there a D&D subreddit? I've never played before and I think I'd like to get into this. I'm sure a few a my friends would be willing to give it a go. Where should a complete D&D newb start? Got a link or something? TIA.

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 4 points5 points 6 months ago[-]

There's an r/rpg, but I'm not sure about D&D. They could tell you, though!

yellowking 3 points4 points 6 months ago[-]

Yes, come visit /r/rpg!

MatttDemon 1 point2 points 5 months ago[-]

Lawful Neutral. - says it's the best one to be, hm.

G-Zom 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

I got neutral too! High five.

ashaelia 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic neutral. Well that's eerie because I generally play as chaotic neutral.

Testsubject28 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Evil

I'm a bit disturbed by this...

Delslayer 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Just curious did both of you just click the submit button without selecting any answers, or did you legitimately do it.

SJ_Zero 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

I just finished going through all the posts and downvoting the posts that were above average score and upvoting the posts that were below average score, leaving the average posts alone.

I'm thinking lawful neutral.

klarth 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Chaotic Neutral. I'm self-important and I have no standards, but I do my best to not be a cock!

moneypej 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Evil.

tsk138 1 point2 points 6 months ago[-]

Neutral Evil

Treysef 0 points1 point 5 months ago[-]

Lawful Good. My facebook page even says so.

[deleted] 6 months ago[-]

[deleted]

S2S2S2S2S2 [S] 2 points3 points 6 months ago[-]

Quoi?