top 200 commentsshow all 364

[–]NightWired 879 points880 points ago*

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I've got you all beat...This is a great one so fucking read it. When I was about 17 I was waiting at my house for my friend to come pick me up to go somewhere.

My step dad asks me to drive him real quick down the road (maybe 2 miles) to pick up his motorcycle at the honda shop. I start driving down the road and my buddy passes me up on the other side of the road, I flag him to turn around, and proceed to drive up to the intersection. (its a 3 way Y) My buddy turns around and pulls up next to me on the wrong side of the road and I tell him I need to drop off my stepdad and to follow me.

I put on my blinker and proceed to make a left at the Y. As i'm doing this, i see a car pulling up to the other stop sign and a cop pulling up behind it. Now the cop has its lights on and I'm thinking hes pulling oer my friend (BTW my buddy doesn't have a license) but he goes around him and pulls me over.

He says I'm giving you a ticket for, 1. speeding 2. going around someone on the shoulder of the road. 3. not using a turn signal. 4. reckless driving and its was an insane amount of money and points.

I tried to explain that I didn't do anything wrong, and my step dad did too. Gave me the tickets anyways... So we plead not guilty and took it to the local magistrate. We explained the situation and the judge seemed like she understood, but then finds me guilty on all counts!! I'm like WTF?!? So now my step dads really pissed, normally he probably wouldn't believe me but he was there so awesomeness ensues..

Ok to make a long story short he went through a lot of trouble taking pictures and graphs etc. and we filed another appeal. This time it was in big time court, and the place was cmpletely packed wall to wall. there were all police standing up around the perimeter of the wall and inmates in shackles in the jury area waiting trial.

Before our turn we went up to the cop and asked if we could just pay the fine and he drop the points, he walks over to the assistant DA and they both look over and she has a dumb ass grin on her face and he walks back over and says the DA said no she wants to charge you with everything!!!

Now we are super pissed. Now what makes this story really great is this....When you are in court, the only people who can defend you are yourself or a lawyer. I did not have a lawyer so I wasn't allowed to have my step dad help me.

So here it goes.... Its our turn, they call us up and its me, my step dad and my buddy. (BTW I'm shitting bricks) and at the other table is the DA and the cop. So here I am in this huge courtroom packed to the brim, and I'm representing myself, now i sat there and just watched 5-6 other court cases so I tried to see what words they used. I go up and say. I'd like to call "vinny" (my buddy) to the stand. I say "please state your name to the court" and "So Vinny, on xyz date at aprox. 5:15 will you please state to the court what exactly happened" He proceeds to tell the court exactly what happened and how he was the one who was wrong. Then I have him show on this big graph each car and exactly where they were and where they drove (my stepdad is awesome. and made this huge chart with little cutout cars) Then I called my step dad to the stand. I said " i'd like to call Robert XXXXX to the stand and do the same thing. To make a long story short, the entire courtroom is cracking up because I am this young kid trying to talk like a lawyer and doing a pretty good job at it. Also after each person the DA cross examined them and i watched how she talked. Even the DA and the cop had a dumb ass grin on their face the whole time.

Anyways so now the DA calls the cop to the stand and asks him what happened. He says " I was sitting at the stop sign and i see "vinny" at the stop sign and the defendant came up behind him, and went around him on the shoulder of the road and proceeded to turn and speed no signal etc. So she says "no further questions your honor" now it my turn...

OK so I go up and say " officer soandso, will you kindly show the court on this graph exactly what happened on the day of blah blah, (he picks up the cars and shows them exactly as he stated before" I said "ok, so will you please tell the court where you were exactly when this happened" he says "at the stop sign". I say "ok, can you tell me where exactly Vinny was when you said i went around him" the cop says "at the other stop sign" I say "ok, well was he in front of the line or behind the stop sign?" he says no, I say " was he on the shoulder of the road or over the yellow line on the other side of the road?" he says " No, he was right at the stop sign exactly where he should have been"

So I go, "ok, Your honor I'd like to enter exibit B into evidence" and I go pick up a packet of pictures. The judge says bring them up here, he flips through them smiling from ear to ear, gives them back to me and instructs me to give them to the DA, she looks at them an turns white as a ghost and gives them back. I take the pictures and go up to the cop. I say "officer soandso, take a look at these photographs" and hand them to him and say "So you're telling me! I ran over a fire hydrant, and bush, and a stop sign!!!! (the pictures show a car stopped at the sign right at the marker and the proximity of the stop sign, hydrant, and bush, right next to the road not nearly enough space for a car to squeeze through). He goes. " I guess not" and the entire court breaks out and stand up and starts clapping and howling, I got found not guilty and the cop stormed out the the room slamming the door, and the DA was humiliated. Fuck you guys you fucking fucks!

Tldr; I had a cop blatently lie, fought it, lost, appealed, showed evidence the cop was a big liar to courtroom full of people

[–]iGiveWomenOrgasms_jk 391 points392 points ago

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This story gave me a boner. a JUSTICE boner. great story bro

[–]03Titanium 105 points106 points ago

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There are not enough justice boners in the world anymore. Now every one is a vein packed, rock hard, full tent pitching, blood rush of awesomeness.

.......what did I just type?

[–]Suprbad 27 points28 points ago

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Justice boners are my favourite kind of boners

[–]sireris 7 points8 points ago

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I have the most awkward justice boner right now.

[–]Mattbeezy89 5 points6 points ago

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wtv it was, it's spot on.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

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That's called a Jimmy Justice.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]GodMadePigs4Bacon 4 points5 points ago

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Consider me subscribed.

[–]GreatBonerOfJustice 1 point2 points ago

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this is relevant to my interests

[–]Theawesomething 1 point2 points ago

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I'mg guessing you're admin. Make it only for stories of justice getting dished. Not this spiderman crap.

[–]readforit 2 points3 points ago

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a JUSTICE boner ??? I had a massive JUSTICE orgasm !!!

[–]deadliftpookie 2 points3 points ago

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Justice boner, justice once, to see if it feels good.

[–]shitty_username 2 points3 points ago

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I just shot justice juice all over the keyboard.

[–]realgenius13 102 points103 points ago

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You can't see it but I'm giving you a standing ovation at my desk!

[–]NightWired 68 points69 points ago

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Thanks, its funny because the other day (im 28 now) my step dad told me it was the proudest he ever was of me that day, truly one of the highlights of my youth

[–]elastic-craptastic 125 points126 points ago

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If you makes you feel even better, it's the proudest I've ever been of you as well.

[–]bdog2g2 4 points5 points ago

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Congrats.

One question though. Are you scared you peaked too soon now?

[–]AerieC 24 points25 points ago

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So, you're a lawyer now, right?

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]JCongo 12 points13 points ago

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NOTICE: This domain name expired on 01/05/2012 and is pending renewal or deletion.

godaddy? switch that shit....

[–]rpostgut 1 point2 points ago

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This is capitalism, let the man shop where he wants.

[–]arbivark 2 points3 points ago

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Back when I had a law firm, my senior partner had had experiences like that. His dad and all his brothers were eye doctors (a few of you would know the name dr tavel) but after the 4th time of beating the local cop in traffic court he decided he'd go to law school,and that's how be became the black sheep of his family. We were both half-assed lawyers and he was usually too busy fighting his brothers over the family business,and telling stories, to do any useful work, so after 3 years we hung it up, but we're back in touch lately.

[–]mapachethegreat 9 points10 points ago

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Cops don't get in trouble for lying in court, do they? If anyone else does the same, it's contempt.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Khaibit 0 points1 point ago

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Considering that cops can essentially murder people in cold blood and just get a paid vacation for a couple weeks...does this surprise you?

[–]In_The_Wrong 0 points1 point ago

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Read my post.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points ago

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When you were calling up your friend Vinny I was hoping this was going to turn into a Joe Pesci flick.

[–]gleenglass 0 points1 point ago

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The two youts.

[–]arbivark 1 point2 points ago

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Utes.

[–]keesh 42 points43 points ago

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I just broke my monitor trying to give this post a high five, worth it.

[–]RockyTalkie 7 points8 points ago

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I'm going to court in 3 days, your story gave me a tiny glimmer of hope. Thanks!!!... Except that I'm guilty as sin 0_o

[–]AforAnonymous 11 points12 points ago

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Your honor, I'd like to enter RockyTalkie's comment on reddit from January 6, 2012 into evidence.

[–]XAPHAIS 20 points21 points ago

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This story gave me goosebumps.

Bravo for taking to time to stick it to the man and fight for what is right.

[–]reiwan 11 points12 points ago

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Ok to make a long story short...

I dont think this means what you think it means.

[–]jestax 16 points17 points ago

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Damn, you sir are a badass.

Most people would have just said fuck it and paid the fine and everything then grumbled about how the court system isn't fair, but you went through and fought it the right way with real evidence and won.

Also, you win Reddit for the day.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]frahs 51 points52 points ago

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engineering student here. I can verify that no girl wants to fuck me.

[–]AMBsFather 1 point2 points ago

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Dude you have me fucking cracking up still

[–]pikob 1 point2 points ago

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OP is very lucky that cop was stating something that was actually physically impossible. Most people will not be able to prove that the cop is lying.

[–]Thunder99 9 points10 points ago

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So not only were they hell bent on busting you to the fullest extent, but also didn't even have the human decency to apologize to you after being proven wrong? Unreal. People like that shouldn't be allowed in positions of authority.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Melnorme 9 points10 points ago

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If you weren't a drug dealer, why were you driving a drug dealer's car?

[–]V3rtigo 10 points11 points ago

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TIL I'm a drug dealer

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]derpaherpa 3 points4 points ago

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It took me about half an hour to read that because I'm drunk but boy was it worth it. Fucking worth it. Heart pumping of joy and everything.

[–]Scumbag_Steve_Bot 2 points3 points ago

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Ok sir, I'm gonna have to ask you to step away from the computer.

[–]Vinc3ntPh4m 4 points5 points ago

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It's fucking wonderful to hear fucking dick bag douchecanoes like these who usually get away with this bullshit to be humiliated like this. YOU DESERVE A MEDAL!

[–]uneditablepoly 7 points8 points ago

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That must have felt so good. I bet it was hard to maintain your composure when you emerged victorious. It always looks easy in movies but, when the time comes, it's actually hard to remain mature when you win out over someone you truly despise.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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I didn't know you were allowed to appeal verdicts on traffic tickets. Nice job!

[–]missingfeature 2 points3 points ago

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[–]shzadh 2 points3 points ago

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Amazing story. Makes me feel confident that I can still do something about injustice even though I'm just 18.

[–]morlakai 2 points3 points ago

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what the fuck are you doing here go apply for law school

[–]queenw_hipstur 3 points4 points ago

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Dude, can I make this into a short film? This has feel good written all over it. I LOVE this. You're a great story teller. I visualized the whole thing. Amazing!!!!

[–]piroko05 7 points8 points ago

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Pics or it didn't happen.

[–]360walkaway 19 points20 points ago

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Will a graph suffice?

[–][deleted] ago*

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[deleted]

[–]Khalku 6 points7 points ago

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[–]thrash56 2 points3 points ago

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[–]TrainFan 2 points3 points ago

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[–]Phonda 1 point2 points ago

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Have my fucking upvote and cherish it. I don't give them out very often.

[–]Titanosaurus 1 point2 points ago

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Go to law school, do this for a living.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Titanosaurus 1 point2 points ago

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You did everything a good attorney would do on cross! Good job, consider being an attorney.

[–]gleenglass 1 point2 points ago

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I have interned at two municipalities and it burns me up to know that officers that I've had to rely on to prosecute cases could very well potentially be big fat liars that I have to work with regularly and if their dishonesty becomes an issue, it could not only fuck up a lot of my cases but worse, INFRINGE ON SOMEONE ELSE'S RIGHTS!

I didn't become a lawyer to be the man. I did it so I could help put bad guys in jail and help other people have their rights protected.

[–]martyvt12 1 point2 points ago

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The sad thing is that 9/10 people would just pay the tickets. This is why cops need to be seriously punished for charging people wrongfully. He should have to personally pay you for your time spent defending yourself.

[–]AMBsFather 1 point2 points ago

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The need to let us know your father made an extraordinary graph with cut out cars, which I believe may have taken him a decent amount of time to do, plus be an exhibit to prove this cop wrong, gave me the best JUSTICE boner ever.

[–]Huangdingo 5 points6 points ago

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All at age 17. well played sir.

[–]FanofBacon 6 points7 points ago

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I cryde dis tiem

[–]cfenton23 1 point2 points ago

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When you started with saying you got everyone beat I read it hoping to prove you wrong but it was I who was proven wrong. Bravo, sir. Bravo.

[–]ackthecat 4 points5 points ago

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Excellent story. Thank you for sharing. So what happened to the lying cop? How much jail time did the court sentence him for perjury?

[–]tastypuffs 0 points1 point ago

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So very glad I read this.

[–]lev00r 0 points1 point ago

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I gave you your 666th upvote. Your welcome

[–]JethatRED 0 points1 point ago

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They should make a movie of this, I would definitely pay to see that.

[–]karmakazze 52 points53 points ago

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I succesfully defended myself in court. The story goes like this: I recieved a speeding ticket from a police officer stationed on the median on the highway. When in court, the officer went through a standard line of questioning from the state's attorney. One of the questions was "From the time your radar registered the defendants vehicle to the time you pulled the vehicle over, did you ever lose sight of the vehicle?". The officer said "No." (presumably this is to remover the possibilty taht someone else with a simialir vehicle could be clocked speeding and they accidentally pull over somone else ina similair vehicle) Anyhow, when it came my turn to cross examine the police officer I asked "When you clocked the vehicle that was speeding, did you check for oncoming traffic while pulling out from the median?" The officer answered "Yes." I turned to the judge and said "Since this officer stated that she never lost sight of my vehicle, and also that she checked for oncoming traffic before pulling out of the median and pulling me over, I respectfully ask that this case be dismissed on the grounds that the state's only witness has obviosuly perjured herself in court." Case dismissed.

[–]idefiler6 8 points9 points ago

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Good fucking call!

[–]piroko05 1 point2 points ago

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If this seriously works, that would be awesome.

[–]CSFFlame 1 point2 points ago

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oh snap

[–]obviousstatement 1 point2 points ago

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I love this story, but did you have a plan on how/what you would have said if the officer would have said no? Just curious because I would like to know the appropriate way to respond.

[–]karmakazze 2 points3 points ago

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No plan. It just occured to me in court. I was planning on pleading guilty until I realized that there's a standard line of questioning for the officer in the beginning and that the standard answers had set me up for a win.

[–]drfreeman2718 0 points1 point ago

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Wait, I'm confused. Were you actually speeding?

[–]XenoXilus 5 points6 points ago

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Doesn't even matter, just proved that the cop just lied.

[–]SqrtSayLor 1 point2 points ago

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...justice prevails?

[–]organic_alchemy 26 points27 points ago

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I not only defended myself, but two others. Those two others were my ex-girlfriend and old roommate.

Warning: Crazy Long Post Ahead.

It started in March of 2010. We moved into an apartment in an older, somewhat historic neighborhood of the city. All three of us decided to get a decent apartment for the three of us because we all hung out all the time. He and I had been friends for years and and She and I had been dating for almost a year at this point.

Everything was pretty great, but the apartment was falling apart. In no particular order these are the things that were wrong.

  • The water heater was red-tagged. The pipes flowed uphill. So if we had succesfully lit the pilot light our first night, we all would have died.

  • The kitchen sink had been steadily leaking into the walls all summer. Water creeped into the walls beneath the basement and created a collapse in the concrete. This hole did not get fixed untill January. The hole had been there since July.

  • The heat didn't work. Gas and electric were skittish. Used space heaters and body heat for warmth.

  • We get an upstairs neighbor in Novemeber. Cool guy. However, every time he showers all of the water would drip into one of our hallways. Soaking the carpet with somewhat soapy water for hours at a time. He showered every day for about twenty minutes. I called the landlord instantly. No answer. Left a message. Called every day for a week. Didn't get fixed. Then called every Monday for four months. Four fucking months. Didn't get fixed.

  • When it did get fixed because someone called the Department of Health and Neighborhood Code. We had started refering to the hallway as the Mushroom Forest. Because there were mushrooms growing out of the carpet. The roommate ended up getting very sick. Hospital Bills around 2000. When they fixed the hallway they found three birds nests in the walls of our apartment along with spiders fucking everywhere.

  • Speaking of spiders, the basement was littered with 'em. And you had to go outside to get to the basement. The basement ceiling wasn't really tall so I had to crouch every time I was out there. I'm like 6'6'' and this was maybe a 6' room. Spiders in my hair.

  • Did I mention this is where the washer and dryer was?

  • Did I mention that everytime we ran the washing machine it flooded the basement? Did I mention that the lock on the basement didn't work? Did I mention we live in Northern Indiana? No ability to do laundry at my own apartment for months. Laundromated that bitch up.

tldr: apartment was owned by a slumlord.

While we had been living here. We didn't mow the lawn because that was stated in the contract that it was the landlord's responsibility. He never did it and I called him multiple times about it. Eventually the city ended up doing it. And then the landlord billed us for it along with interest.

I said fuck that.

Showed him in an email that it was his respoinsibilty and he then sends me a bill for electric, gas, and water which he said he would pay for in the contract because it was included in our rent. ** It was a bill tuned to about 4000 dollars.**

He said he would take me and my roommates to court. Challenge Accepted.

I gathered all of the evidence. Phone records. Photos. Files from the city and from his other tennets. Looked up similar cases. Got people to testify from Neighborhood Code, The Health Dept, and the Gas Company to essentially convict the fuck out of him.

It came time to go to court. This was months after we had all moved into seperate places. I got a place on my own because me and the girlfriend broke up and I wasn't really friends with the roommate anymore. I send them both a message saying this is the court date and this is the plan and no response. Nothing. Not a word.

So I go in, by myself, with a folder of evidence, dressed in a way that MaleFashionAdvice would be proud of and I destroyed him. Not only got all the charges cleared but ended up getting all of my rent returned to me along with damages.

Called ex to tell her the good news. Didn't answer.

Thought something was fishy. So I went over to roommates place.

Saw her car there. Shit.

Turns out they had been sleeping together for months and months, even when we had been living together. I had planned to marry this girl. Love of my life. Broke my heart in ten thousand ways.

TL;DR - Lived in a shitty apartment with a friend and a fiance who were sleeping together for months. Defended them in court like a boss, won almost 5000 dollars in the suit. Didn't share it and didn't have to since they didn't show up in court.

[–]detersion47 3 points4 points ago

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Nice story, sorry about the heartbreak though...

[–]organic_alchemy 2 points3 points ago

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Thanks. I really wish I could hate her. That's the worst part of it. Loved the girl too damn much. Complete blindside.

[–]madwickedguy 1 point2 points ago

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Are they still together?

[–]organic_alchemy 2 points3 points ago

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They broke up like a month ago. I would take her back if she hadn't cheated on me for months. Totally had the best proposal / wedding / honeymoon planned ever. I planned to go to Iceland with her during the summer, both as a symbolic and awesome testament to the plcae and our relationship, because it would never be dark when I was with her. So it was only fitting that we went to a land of endless sunshine during the summer.

[–]sjgarg 1 point2 points ago

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"We had started refering to the hallway as the Mushroom Forest. Because there were mushrooms growing out of the carpet."

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, that just made me shiver... nope. nope.. get the image out of my head... I suffer from mycophobia, and if I were ever in that situation, I'd have ran away to a new place and sued the landlord into oblivion.

[–]organic_alchemy 1 point2 points ago

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Do you want pics? Because I've got 'em.

[–]mrnuggs 19 points20 points ago

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I had just gotten a brand new Acura TSX. I was driving home from work one day, and bumper to bumper traffic was so bad, I had left my car in Sport Mode(where you can manually shift up and down). I had kept the car in 1st gear the whole way until I had to make a left hand turn. The left hand turn lane was completely empty and upon entering the lane, the turn arrow had turned green.

I continue to drive through the lane and into the turn without thinking of shifting up. Halfway into the turn, I had pushed down on the gas a little too hard. That along with the fact I was so high up on RPMs that the VTECH kicked in and give my car an EXTRA boost of power causing me to fish tail. As soon as I noticed this I took my foot off the gas, corrected myself and took the car out of Sport mode.

Before I know it, I have a cop on my ass, lights me up. I pull over instantly, do everything right. Turn off car, lower window, keep hands on steering wheel. Cop comes over, asks me if I know why, the usual. I told him the TRUTH. It was 100% an accident. I Wasn't trying to show off, there was no one to show off to. Just a plain ol accident. He didn't buy it, wrote me an Exhibition of Speed ticket. Which in California is a 2 point misdemeanor. Over $1,000 fine and possible 6 month license suspension.

At this point I thought I was fucked. I go to pre-trial. Plead not guilty. Was given my actual court date. Now after doing research, I thought I would have one more court date before the actual hearing. Where the DA meets with you and you are appointed a public defender. Little did I know that wasn't going to happen.

On the court date I walk in, there's a bunch of other people there waiting for trial. I ask the court clerk if i'd be meeting with my Public Defender, she says this isn't that kind of trial. So I have no defense and just a copy of my ticket.

I have only an hour or so to think of my defense, I study the ticket and realize one thing. My posted speed was WAY under the actual limit. My only real defense. The cop was there and was giving me this shit eating grin the whole time pretty much letting me know i'm fucked.

My name is called up, I get sworn in, cop tells his side of the story. Which he didn't lie, everything he told was the truth. Now it was my turn. I tell the judge exactly what happened, how I had been in Sport mode, had forgotten to shift up midway through the turn and the my RPMs were pretty high that the VTECH had kicked in to cause me to do so. I told him i had ZERO INTENT to show off or exhibit any sort of speed. I also noted that when the error occured I immediately corrected the issue and drove off at a normal speed. If I was trying to exhibit speed, I would have continued to take off.

Judge sat there for a minute, scratched his head. Asked me a few questions, told me he knew a lot about cars and can see how this issue can occur. He mentioned that what I did was not safe and could have easily spun out. He thought about it some more, said, "I find that there was a violation, but this violation was done without any intent, I find you NOT GUILTY".

The cops jaw dropped to the floor, he stood there. I thanked the judge profusely and walked out jumping for joy. The cop walked out behind me and was talking shit under his breath. We rode the elevator down together, he said nothing.

About 2 weeks later I saw the same cop pulling someone over right in front of my office, he looked right at me. I just smiled at him and shook my head. He couldn't do anything about it.

[–]Sub_NerdBoy 7 points8 points ago

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[–]hyperkinetic 1 point2 points ago

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Just a tip for next time: Always look up the offense on your ticket. I beat slightly more than half the tickets I received while living in CA this way! Quite often they write the wrong charge, which in most courts is an automatic dismissal.

[–]lpisme 1 point2 points ago

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No possible jail time = no right to a public defender, fyi.

[–]willfe 37 points38 points ago

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I've been sued three times and successfully defended myself in all three cases. Two were in small claims courts (where it's not uncommon for plaintiffs and defendants to represent themselves), and one was in a district court. I'll provide a bit of detail on each to see if anyone's interested in hearing more about any of them. All three cases are unrelated.

First up, a man wrote me a bad check as a partial payment for a software project I was working on for him. When he refused to remit payment for the check itself and the resulting bank fee, I sued him in a small claims court in California for actual ($900, plus the bank fee and court costs) and punitive ($2,700, triple the original check's value, the maximum allowed by California law) damages. He countersued (for $450, a payment he'd made in cash a day earlier on the same contract), claiming the work had never been done.

The court dismissed both claims -- mine because he'd tried to pay before our contract required him to and thus wasn't liable (since he paid early, he technically didn't owe the money when the check bounced), and his because I (easily) demonstrated to the court that significant work had been completed. As an amusing postscript, after the court's decision had been mailed to us both, he contacted me to insist that the "right thing" would be for me to pay him the amount he'd sued for anyway. I copied the court on my (written) response to that lunacy and never heard from him again.

Next, a woman who rented me a room in her home for a few months (before throwing me out) sued me in a Florida small claims court for about $2,500 for an assortment of complaints. She alleged I had caused significant property damage, left unsanitary conditions requiring professional cleaners to resolve, intentionally driven her electric bill to the $400-$500 per month range, stiffed her on costs for a party she hosted (for her friends, mind you), and sabotaged all her personal and professional relationships.

The court dismissed her claim. She presented very little actual evidence (owing largely to the fact that none of what she claimed had actually happened in the first place), and my defense consisted mostly of examining each of her claims individually and demolishing each one systematically.

Finally, a company sued me in an Alabama district court for unspecified damages, alleging breach of contract and defamation in response to a detailed investigative series of articles and blog posts I wrote after participating in their overpriced entrepreneurial seminar and concluding it was a colossal rip-off. The suit followed months of threats from the company and a failed attempt at amicable reconciliation.

The suit was settled before a trial date was set on terms that were very favorable to me. The company and its attorney conducted themselves quite poorly in their actions and statements to the court, and my 13-page written response to the complaint detailing my defense against their complaints and documenting their (unlawful) behavior both prior to filing and their deliberate distortion of facts during preliminary proceedings was enough to convince the company that I wouldn't back down or stay quiet like they'd hoped. They begged to settle exactly one day before the first hearing (set by the court in response to my various motions to dismiss).

At the time, I couldn't afford an attorney to defend against this one. Had the company won a judgment against me and been awarded essentially any amount in damages, I'd have been forced into bankruptcy. They sought unspecified but presumably very high damages, as their chief complaint was they were seeing significant drops in enrollment numbers (and each "student" pays $7,000+ for one of their scammy seminars).

If any of this is of interest at all, I'd be glad to provide more details and/or do an AMA. The district court case would probably be the most "interesting" of the bunch, as it involves a scummy company litigating to silence an online critic. I'm pleased at the outcome of the case, though -- the company has since changed its name and moved all its "seminars" onto cruise ships where they can be held in international waters to avoid running afoul of various laws they were undoubtedly breaking in the United States and elsewhere.

[–]learnforthefuture 8 points9 points ago

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yes tell us more

[–]ras344 3 points4 points ago

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Yes, I would very much like to hear about this seminar case.

[–]willfe 0 points1 point ago

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Which of the three cases that I described piqued your interest the most?

[–]frahs 1 point2 points ago

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TELL US WHICH COMPANY IT WAS

[–]willfe 1 point2 points ago

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That's sadly the one thing I can't do (per the terms of our settlement). I'd be glad to provide plenty of details about their scam, however, and I certainly don't mind explaining the particulars of the case itself. It's not even remotely hard to figure out which company this was, though admittedly they were small potatoes when this conflict between us began and they're even smaller now, so it's unlikely you've heard of them directly and even if you heard their sales pitch without my particular biases you'd very likely think it was horseshit without my having to explain it further.

They've rebranded themselves since our case was settled (and I like to think I provided them with some motivation along those lines, too) -- they witnessed first-hand the power of the Streisand effect (when I first publicized that they'd threatened to sue, I immediately received several offers from other web sites to mirror the "offending" article in question) and after unsuccessfully trying to strong-arm other webmasters to remove the copies, they decided that renaming themselves would be cheaper and easier.

Last I checked, their shtick hadn't changed a bit though. They like to bill what they do an "MBA-level education in a week," but it's nothing more than a week-long seminar with unremarkable "instructors," most (if not all) of whom have met with some limited financial success by exploiting former and current attendees. They target would-be entrepreneurs, i.e. middle-class marks who want to start a business but aren't sure how to go about doing any of it. It's a precise combination of attributes that makes for a good "mark" for them -- you have to be either connected just well enough to beg, borrow, or steal about $8,000 (for "tuition," transportation, hotel, and meals), which they openly encourage you to do (going as far as to teach you what "usury" is so you stay out of legal trouble), or you have to actually have that much cash on hand and be gullible enough to spend it on the scam.

The actual pitch is that no matter what aspect of launching your business is currently lacking, they'll teach you the skills you need to launch and run a successful business and connect you with an assortment of people who can (for a fee, naturally) help you get started. Like any marketing scam, the actual product or service you plan to offer is entirely irrelevant.

What you actually encounter when you arrive at one of the seminars is about what you'd expect: a (small) convention center with a couple of hundred clueless people with vague ideas that they think are worth some money, surrounded by snake oil salesmen and confidence tricksters who know their prey has just been corralled into a barrel for them to shoot at will. They circle like vultures. The victims, already stretched very thin by having spent so much (possibly borrowed) money, are desperate to come home from the seminar with some kind of tangible "win" to show for their efforts (and money), and so many very foolish contracts are signed and many doomed business relationships are formed. It's not until everybody's gone home that the victims start to realize it really was a bit funny how all the "instructors" and coaches just happened to have copies of all the right paperwork with them to create legally binding agreements to provide meaningless services at exorbitant prices.

Heh. I could babble about these assholes all day :) Their name isn't important -- the critical thinking required to recognize their scam is what matters. Since I learned it the hard way myself it doesn't bother me to help others not make the same mistake.

[–]flightdeck 67 points68 points ago

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I am not a lawyer who has successfully defended himself in court.

[–]malmad 6 points7 points ago

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...and?

[–]Bowmore 49 points50 points ago

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That's about it. He might be a CEO of a multinational company, a famous gunslinger, a drug dealer who enjoys ping pong or a lawyer who has unsuccessfully defended himself in court. But he's definately not a lawyer who has successfully defended himself in court.

[–]bobandy47 17 points18 points ago

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I prefer to believe that he is a former tennis great with a fondness for gardening.

[–]ropers 14 points15 points ago

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It's a joke, riffing on the ambiguity (and lack of appropriate punctuation) of the original request.

Read:

Someone who is NOT <a lawyer that has successfully defended themselves in court>.

instead of the intended:

Someone who has successfully defended themselves in court and isn't a lawyer.

[–]malmad 7 points8 points ago

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Yeah. I'm an idiot.

Thank you.

[–]ropers 5 points6 points ago

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No, you're probably not. But you're welcome. :)

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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I'm giving you an upvote because I was waiting in tense anticipation, too. I've never felt so let down.

[–]daymoose 12 points13 points ago

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I think flightdeck was just trying to be a grammar nazi about the misplaced modifier.

[–]ColonelMolerat 9 points10 points ago

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He won't be able to do an AMA, but my old flatmate & chums did. It was before I knew them, so I don't know much, but it was basically:

They lived in a shithole flat and asked the landlord to let them end their contract six months early.

In the six month until their contract would normally have run out, the local yoof broke in to the apartment building, trashed the hallways and broke the windows of the flat. The landlord association tried to get them to pay damages, so they had to fight it in court.

The contract had small print that said they were responsible (ie, they weren't really allowed to end the contract early), but the judge ruled that pretty much, 'the print was too small' - it wasn't made clear enough in the contract.

One of my friends, the story goes, was a complete legend - made sure she had ALL the info about where they were on what days, exactly when they left, what condition they left the building in, etc. She won the case for them, essentially. My old flatmate was a bit more absent minded - "They kept asking where I was on particular days months ago... I can't remember where I was last week." He got a special mention from the judge "Miss Friend-of-Molerat, you have been very helpful and prepared... Mr Flatmate-of-Molerat, well... You weren't much use at all" (Or something along those lines).

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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Yea, a situation like this was what I was looking for (although a bigger case would be more dramatic). Coming prepared, knowing facts, all while not being a lawyer. I feel like a judge would interested to hear someone so prepared represent themselves.

[–]ColonelMolerat 2 points3 points ago

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It's a shame I don't know more, but it was a while before I knew them. It was all down to the well-prepared friend being confident, clear and researching EXACTLY what happened - not knowing legal stuff, just knowing what she did, where she was, etc. From what I heard, she was truly amazing in court, saved them all hundreds of pounds and wouldn't take any shit from the company trying to screw them all over.

EDIT:

But yes, a murder would have been more interesting.

[–]mlane021 8 points9 points ago

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i've defended myself in 5 speeding tickets now and won each time

[–]ephesios 6 points7 points ago

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how did you manage that?

[–]ANewMachine615 9 points10 points ago

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It's quite common for arresting officers to never even show. Then it's an affidavit (the ticket generally counts as such) vs. your in-person word, and reasonable doubt is easy.

[–]V3rtigo 2 points3 points ago*

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In California, you can have a Trial by Written Declaration. Basically you pay the fine, write a report based on your side of the story, cop writes theirs, and a judge reads both and decides. I was 4 for 4. My guess is that the cops never wrote a report at all because in one case, I even admitting to speeding but not to the speed claimed. All 4 fines were refunded after the judgement.

[–]hyperkinetic 1 point2 points ago

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i've defended myself in 5 speeding tickets now and won each time

Amateur! I've beat at least 30 moving violations when I lived in CA. The clerks at the court knew me by name. The Malibu Sheriff makes it's money ticketing kids driving through their territory. 'Driving while young' plus whatever else they could make up was the usual offense.

[–]yestheirmom 7 points8 points ago*

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It didn't actually go to court, but I once got popped for 'Knowingly driving while on a suspended license in Florida', which is a misdemeanor.

I was a poor student and didn't have any money for a lawyer, so I went in on my own knowing they didn't have any proof that I actually knew my license was suspended.

Basically, the judge said that since I could afford to go to school that he would not grant me a public defender because I likely had enough money to afford my own. I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THEY COULD DO THAT.

I had to send a letter to the prosecutor since he wouldn't speak to me in person(even though he legally could since I was my own representation) and basically let him know my story and that there was no evidence that I actually knew, and he agreed to drop the charges on the basis that I likely wouldn't get convicted with no evidence if I got a signed affidavit that went along with my story. Got the affidavit and got my charges dropped that day.

[–]ciavs 4 points5 points ago

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Yep, if you cannot afford an attorney one will be appointed to you. America fuck yeah!

[–]idefiler6 3 points4 points ago

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It's true. But they never count your debt to income ratio. I needed a pubbie a few years ago, but "I make too much money to qualify", even though at the time I could afford my bills and that's about it.

[–]Beaglepower 1 point2 points ago

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I've never actually heard a state attorney admit that you would probably not get convicted. Why was your license suspended? The state can use a court judgment or order suspending your license as a rebuttable presumption that you knew, unless it was for failure to pay a traffic ticket or a financial responsibility violation (i.e. child support.)

As far as getting a Public Defender, each defendent is supposed to complete an affidavit of indigency, in which they swear under oath to their total income and assets. The clerk of the court is then supposed to determine whether they qualify.

In reality, every judge is different. Some give a lawyer to anyone who wants one (I've seen that in juvenile courts a lot.) Some adhere very strictly to the indigency requirements...and you do have to be pretty poor to qualify.

[–]ANewMachine615 0 points1 point ago

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You don't even have a federal Constitutional right to an attorney unless the crimes you're charged with are either a felony, or a misdemeanor that results in imprisonment or probation. He was totally within his rights to deny you, provided there's no contrary provision in the FL Const. Many states are more liberal with those things.

[–]Azphael 5 points6 points ago

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1) Failure to control speed to avoid a collision. 2) Did not do any research. Was young and stupid. (Mom says "Always will be") 3) Dad advised to pay the ticket and be done. Responded: Fuck the police. 4) Points on license, $130.00 fine. 5) Yes.

Before going through the more serious cases, the first 30 minutes in court were dedicated to all the speeding tickets. Those were the best 30 minutes of free entertainment in my life. The demeanor of the judge who had been through this thousands of times before. The cops that didn't argue but simply stated the infraction and ignored the defendant's bullshit excuse/response. The unemotional signing of countless FTA (Failure to Appear - Hello warrant for arrest). The judge barely looked up from the paper work he was blasting through. "How do you plead?" "Can you explain your actions?"

It was like watching the accused struggle against an overpowering force and being washed away.

Also, the cop who issued my ticket didn't show up so I "won" by default. Though for my particular case, the judge decided to wait two minutes to see if the cop would show up. He showed the first sign of emotion when he dismissed my case and said in a disappointing tone "The other party wrote a letter..." I never found out what that lady wrote about what happened.

[–]Dokkan 5 points6 points ago

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I've represented myself in my own divorce case, in court. No biggie, probably not exactly what you were after.

[–]Simon_Plenderson 1 point2 points ago

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Whoa, how did that go?

[–]Dorktron2000 0 points1 point ago*

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While working in divorce court, almost 75% of the people I saw were self represented.

edit: grammar for idiots

[–]hyperkinetic 3 points4 points ago*

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While in my early 20s and living in L.A. I was getting on the 101 freeway at Winetka. It was dusk and traffic was moderate. As I attempted to merge from the on-ramp, some asshat in a Cadillac, who was easily 3-4 car lengths back, decides he doesn't want to let me in and speeds up. I hear his engine race and see the nose of his car lurch upwards as he tries to close the gap. At this point I'm out of on-ramp and would be forced to drive on the shoulder if I don't continue on my current trajectory.

I get in, but now I'm pinned behind a flatbed truck, to the point that my bumper is under his flatbed, and now have this raging asshole tailgating me, honking his horn and high-beaming me. I do the sensible thing and change lanes.

I'm not out of this guys way more than two seconds before he follows my move. I wait for a window of opportunity and change lanes again, and again he follows me, tailgating me and blinding me the entire time.

I change lanes again into the fast lane, he follows, I get ahead and get into the #2 lane. I'm free from him for about a quarter mile when I see him speed up and cut the guy behind me off. He must have had extra bright asshole lights because each time he brighted me I couldn't see shit. I change again into the fast lane, he follows but this time I've got no way out. Traffic has thickend up a bit and I can't make another move, and all I can make out ahead of me are tail lights.

I do the only sensible thing and slow down to a sane speed. I took my foot off the gas and continued to coast, allowing traffic to get ahead of me. I kept my eye out for an opening and made my move. I managed to get across a couple of lanes and finally over to the side of the road. A moment later the same asshat is behind me, high beams blazing. I tried to read his front license place, but he had pulled up too close. I pulled up a foot to try in read it though the glare, but he was intentionally trying to obscure it. I had enough and knew I had better find a cop.

I took off down the White Oak off ramp and headed towards Ventura Blvd. This asshole followed me the entire way. I pulled every trick I could and finally got far enough ahead of him to lose him for a minute. I pulled into a drug store parking lot and ran inside. I asked to use the phone and told the manager I was being chased by a crazy person. I called 911, told them my story, and waited for the cops.

About 30 minutes later the CHP showed up. I sat in the front seat and told him exactly what happened with no embellishments. He took the report and we both went on our ways.

A few months later I receive a letter from an attorney saying I'm being sued civilly for $200K for causing a three car accident on the freeway!!

Apparently, a third driver had driven full speed into the back of the asshole as we slowed in the fast lane, and another car was unable to completely stop before hitting the second driver.

The discovery letters from various law firms started pouring in. I shopped around for an attorney, but even the retainer was out of my budget. I had little choice to handle this myself. My mom had been a legal secretary before I was born and at least she knew how to properly format my responses, but obviously wasn't able to answer legal questions.

I went to the library and looked up every charge. I really started to shit when I went to the CHP and got a copy of the final report. There wasn't a single word from my account to the officer. Nothing about him tail-gating me. Nothing about him following me through 5-6 lane changes. Nothing about blinding me. The report could have been written by the road raging asshole. Despite the odds, I fought on and responded to every document, and filed them personally.

It took two years of research, responses, and depositions before I was to go to court. At the last minute one of the plaintiffs had pushed for arbitration and got it.

The day of I made my case. I told the above story and included pictures of the car I drove that night. There wasn't a scratch on it, as it had never been in an accident. The whole affair took about two hours. We were told we would receive the verdict in the mail.

A month later I got the answer. The asshole was found 80% at fault. The driver who rear-ended him 20%. Myself and the third driver were absolved of any fault.

It absolutely is possible to represent yourself in court and win. I've beaten dozens of traffic tickets and caught cops in a lie on the stand more than once. Two years ago I beat down an attorney in housing court.

[–]CJDreadd 17 points18 points ago

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My mom was driving child-me and one of my friends home from Burger King one afternoon. She got pulled over by an officer, and was given a ticket for running a red light.

I was too young to remember what actually happened. I wasn't paying attention, because Burger King toys were way too cool and distracting for me to watch boring adults driving.

My mom fought the ticket and went to court. She pleaded not guilty, and her reasoning was that "the light was pink."

Yep, pink. The light was pink.

All charges dropped.

Her mother (my grandmother) did this exact same thing in the 80s.

[–]alexkitsune 6 points7 points ago

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.....What.

[–]xHeero 5 points6 points ago

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I've seen some lights like this where the red light is actually very pink looking. Generally its just an old traffic light that hasn't been properly maintained. I could definitely see that arguement working if you provide evidence in the form of a video or picture.

[–]SeanLOSL 3 points4 points ago

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Am i missing something here?

[–]Eboe101 1 point2 points ago

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Can't tell if a really awesome Argument... or just a broken system.

[–]damagicsausage 4 points5 points ago

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-Crazy long post... Sorry

So this starts as I was driving to my GFs house, on my birthday. As I was pulling off of the HOV overpass where the speed limit was 65 and I was going about 70, I reached the main interstate where the speed limit drops to 55. Now I at the transition I noticed alot of state cars so I thought it was a speed trap and proceeded to coast down to the speed limit and merged so I would be going what everyone else was going, a bit above 60. A state patrol car turns on his lights and gets behind me, so I pull over. I was polite and answered all the troopers questions and he ticketed me for reckless driving. 20+ MPH over the speed limit. I asked him why I would get this as I have never been ticketed for speeding before and he gave me a smirk like I was lying to him or something.

In my area this is a HUGE deal, about as bad as a DUI. Losing your license, getting a large insurance premium tacked on, and tons of points on your license. So of course I went to fight it in court. I asked the police department for what they had for me sense I had never gotten a speeding ticket before. I had no idea why they would try to put such a severe charge on me for my first offense. They pulled up my DMV history from another state which I just moved from and it showed I had 6 speeding violations in that state. I was just shocked to see this. So I call the out of stat DMV to confirm and they showed a couple warnings for light bulbs and a insurance expired ticket. No speeding from that state.

So I have the out of state DMV fax me the correct information, put that with my current states info, a statement of exactly what happened and went to court to fight the ticket. The trooper offered a cookie cutter statement he gave for 10 other individuals ahead of me saying he calibrated his radar and how fast the suspect was going. Every person guilty. So I go up to the stand and the judge asks me to present my evidence. I give my statement and the judge proceeds to look at my DMV record the trooper gave him, all speeding out of state. The judge asked me about the history and I showed him the fax from the state showing the mistakes the DMV had somehow made. The Judge seemed to ignore everything I said then stated I was guilty of Reckless Driving.

I wasn't happy with this judgment at all and put in a appeal. After waiting about a month I got my court date and brought the same evidence I presented to the previous judge. I really didn't have anything else to go on in my defense. As I am waiting for my chance to speak with the judge the DA comes up to me and asks if I would agree to have the charges changed to 1 mph over the speed limit. I told him I would need to think about it and called my GF at the time. I needed a second opinion as it didn't look like the trooper had shown up for the trial and I didn't know if I wanted to chance him coming in later that day. After talking with her I took the deal and the Judge agreed to bring the charge down and even though I got my first speeding ticket, I believe I got the sentence I deserved as I was speeding.

TLDR: I was pulled over for reckless driving about 4 years ago on my birthday driving to visit my GF. Sentenced Guilty for Reckless Driving in traffic court. Appealed the ruling and was giving a lesser sentence of speeding 1 MPH over.

[–]ackthecat 4 points5 points ago

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It seems that judges routinely ignore evidence provided by the defendant. To be clear I mean ignore, not 'reviewed and found lacking'. Can anyone explain why judges do this? Is there anything that can be done immediately to force the judge to do his/her job? Or is average joe's only recourse to appeal?

[–]xHeero 4 points5 points ago

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They were charging him with speeding 20+ over the limit. How does his previous driving record have anything to do with whether or not he was guilty or not guilty of that particular offense?

Just looking at it objectively.

[–]Achieve_Nirvana 5 points6 points ago

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This might interest you.

There is a documentary about this case somewhere, it's quiet fascinating.

For the lazy: Gideon is a man who was accused of stealing from a bar, he couldn't afford a lawyer so when he went to court he was railed by a prosecutor who had studied the law his whole life. Upon living out his jail sentence, he studied the law and proved it (to the Supreme Court) to be unconstitutional to force people to represent themselves when they can't afford representation. The court must provide counsel in criminal cases for defendants who are unable to afford their own attorneys, only because of this man. Quiet a remarkable story.

[–]idefiler6 3 points4 points ago*

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They will not look at your debt:income ratio. So if you make 40k a year and spend 38k a year in bills (hypothetical amounts), a public defender you will not receive. Upvoted anyway, good story that deserves a read.

[–]trial0r 4 points5 points ago

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This is an interesting IAMA request. Although I am a lawyer, I figured I could respond with what I see in the courtroom. Nothing here is intended to give rise to any sort of attorney-client relationship. This is merely my opinion on the broad subject of self-representation.

Your request seems like it should be narrowed to: "successfully defended themselves in CRIMINAL court." Since I work almost entirely in the civil world, this is a pretty important distinction.

Don't forget that in criminal proceedings, you are entitled to a court-appointed lawyer. I wonder why you are inclined to represent yourself in the treacherous world of criminal law, where ultimately your freedom may be at stake, rather than utilize the free expertise of a public defender? Do you fear that the public defender is in cahoots with the prosecution? Many non-lawyers assume that all lawyers are colluding together in violation of the clients' interests. This is certainly not the case. Believe it or not, the job of public defender is fairly sought after, and in many states is a prerequisite to more desirable positions such as District Attorney. As a result, the pool of public defenders is filled with highly talented and ethical lawyers that have an intimate knowledge of the court procedures, as well as the judges in the locale. Furthermore, if the public defender and prosecuting attorney ARE actually friendly with one another, the most likely result is that the bravado and posturing of offense/defense that lawyers like to assume will be dispensed with and they'll cut right to the chase with regard to a decent plea bargain for you.

In the civil world, where I practice, the procedural requirements with regard to things like types of document submissions, scheduling, deadlines/due dates, hell even font-size, etc. are the most common places where individuals representing themselves get lost.

Let me backtrack a bit. The day-to-day goings on in the courtroom depend on things like the parties' timeliness of filings, following court rules precisely, etc. Courtrooms are extremely overloaded, overburdened, and understaffed. They move slowly, especially if you are in a densely populated county. Judges don't particularly like the fact that their dockets are bursting at the seams, because it creates more work and longer daily calendars for them.

Guess what contributes to this load? That's right, the litigants' failures to follow procedures and court rules.

Guess which litigants overwhelmingly fail to follow the procedures and rules? That's right, the unrepresented litigants. Of course, this is to be expected. After all, litigating lawsuits is not their full time job!

In the courtroom, I have seen a number of unrepresented parties come and go. The reason they usually have to appear is that they have failed to follow some court rule or order. Almost always, the judge is furious with them and will go out of his or her way to make them look foolish in front of the rest of the courtroom. This is likely mostly driven by the court's own interest in having these people acquire counsel, because it would make their case run smoother and be less of a burden on the court. Among fellow lawyers, there is often a palpable feeling when an unrepresented party steps before the judge that something bad is about to happen.

A final point is that judges were once lawyers. Consider the message that "I can be my own lawyer" sends to the judge.

To circle back around to my main point -- if this is a criminal proceeding, you should certainly consider using the valuable resource of the free public defender.

[–]Sui_Juris_Mason 1 point2 points ago

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Ok, I changed my "vote" on this comment twice. You provide some good adivce, that's completely relavant and necessary for anyone considering this route, so you got my up vote. But you provide some "opinions" that are very deceptive, and I'd even say plain wrong. Your whole schpeil about "in cahoots"..... You cannot possibly DENY that a State Bar Lawyer does not have and hold paramount allegiance to, lol, "THE COURT".....meaning that, if there is any matter creating the element of "lack of jurisdiction", that it is NOT in THAT lawyers best interest to argue such a thing. All I'm really getting at here is that a lawyer is loyal to the "court" in which he practices, above his "clients".....and thus, cannot possibly serve the clients best interests in every single case. This, allbeit, is primarily CRIMINAL law, I will admit, and you made a very necessary and important distinction between criminal and civil law/courts, that I'm sure makes a big difference in the way that attorneys treat each other, as well as in how the "COURT" treats the lawyers on each side. An important flaw in almost ever modern "CRIMINAL" case that is NOT prosecuted and fought in a true and ligitamate federal court, is this.... in the courts of the states, the "STATE"(or "state", or "State") is acting both as the accusing party, the prosecution, but is also "HEARING" or "JUDGING" the same. You cannot be unbiased and fair when you are hearing a matter that you are also alegding.... The Constitution states that all matters in which "a state is a party to" should be held in the supreme court. as it holds original and exclusive jurisdiction. I don't mention that often at all, since, first of all, it's a bit absurd. However, too often, the corporation doing business as "the State" is the actual prosecuting party and NOT "the People of the State". which would be what happens when a true grand jury decides there is sufficient evidence to prosecute(indict/present) a case. The Grand Jury IS "the People"..... The D.A.'s office is "the State"(body politic/corporate)....

[–]trial0r 1 point2 points ago

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Your reply is pretty confusing. All lawyers are, by definition, "State Bar Lawyers". To claim that a "State Bar Lawyer" holds the interests of the Court above those of a client is ludicrous. We are sworn to hold our client's interests in the highest regard.

I'm sorry but what you say about "lack of jurisdiction" is unintelligible and I don't quite know what you mean.

The rest of what you say regarding a state as a party to a lawsuit is applicable to civil cases only and is irrelevant to our discussion.

I'll give you the upvote for having a position at least.

[–]Amytherocklobster 5 points6 points ago

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I got a speeding ticket. Choose to have a trial. Got to choose from options of court date and time. Found my cop on Facebook, learned a bit about him and his work schedule. Found out he worked nights, so I choose early morning court session. I went with no defense, no smart plan to get off or trick the judge. He didn't show, case was dismissed. Kinda lame story, but hey it got me off.

[–]omggrok 2 points3 points ago

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I've done this to contest a traffic violation, and won. If that's interesting enough, I'd be happy to elaborate and answer questions.

[–]idefiler6 2 points3 points ago

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If you please. :)

[–]reddit_is_gay 12 points13 points ago

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Great idea! I have often wondered about this myself. It costs a lot these days to have your attorney buy lunch and golf for the prosecuting attorney and judge.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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I'm an attorney. Never do this, really, you are gambling with your future in so many ways and the odds are stacked against you. Especially in the smaller courts, magistrate, small claims, municipal, it's all about who knows who, not the actual law. Just three days ago I had a charge thrown out against a semi-homeless man who is friends with my mom's boss (thus the pro bono) for urinating in public, which is a "lewd conduct" charge in New Orleans, punishable by no less than $100 fine AND at least 30 hours community service, which would have been severe for him. The only thing I did was show up, walk in the back in my suit, talk to the DA for 20 seconds and the ticket was thrown out. This is typical for lawyers with smaller matters - the DA simply throws them out if they're represented by counsel, or if you show up armed for bear, decide it's not worth it to fight it and either offer you a lower charge or just throw it out.

TL;DR - Hire/get a lawyer, you will most likely regret it otherwise.

[–]InfallibleBiship 5 points6 points ago

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I wish none of this were true, but I think it is.

[–]erom 3 points4 points ago

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Maybe a good lawyer. In my experience, any lawyer I can afford is going to be a liability.

[–]skydivingdutch 1 point2 points ago

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Yeah, but if you don't get a pro-bono lawyer, you usually pay more than any fine and insurance premiums. Pay a lawyer $500 or more just to show up. Of course for charges that could result in jail time, it's a different story.

[–]mces97 2 points3 points ago

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My story involved a civil case, not criminal, but our family did not use a lawyer. We had hired a company to do waterproofing for our basement. The only place that leaked was one spot on a wall. We explained our situation and said we wanted to do it from the outside. The companies representative told us it would not work and that with their method there would never be a drop of water in our basement again.His favorite line was this system will relieve the hydrostatic pressure. This company has been around for over 50 years and has actually successfully done work on other people's home on the block. Long story short, after putting in a french drain, this was the result of their waterproofing. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AA2_7NSSZy0 The exact same problem existed, only difference was instead of the water going on our basement floor, it dripped into a 6 inch gap the company left between the wall, floor and french drain. When we asked them why we were still getting water in the house, they changed their entire pitch from, you will never see another drop of water again, to we are controlling the water, exactly as we stated we would. When we threatened to sue them, they said they would come over, free of charge and patch up the wall. The original job cost over 3500 dollars. My father owns a hardware store and first knew that a patch job for what we had would not have worked, but even if they decided to do that, a patch job from the inside like that would cost a fraction of the cost of the $3500.00 job they did. We said that was not good enough and want a full refund or we are taking you to court. Our day in court finally came. It was more of an arbitration hearing than a big court room hearing, but there was a judge in the room. Our family sat on on side of a table, while the company and their lawyer sat on the other side. The lawyer tried to use reverse psychology and contest everything I tried to mention to the judge, but the judge was not having any of it. I showed the youtube video to the judge, and explained what the representative told us. Whenever the judge would ask anyone about if what I said was what they said, they would just say I don't remember it was a long time ago. In the end we received a full refund, and the company was fined the same amount as the original job for deceptive trade practices. The entire process took 3 years. I was glad to see that being honest, and telling the truth worked out in our favor. I would like to think that after this the company has become more honest with perspective clients, but I have heard from more people about horror stories since our dealings with them.

[–]Legos1118 2 points3 points ago

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I successfully defended myself in a court of law. The case involved my crazy escapades on xanax and receiving stolen property which is a class D felony. I didn't need to read up on the law beforehand because my plea was simple. While being questioned I felt like I was losing ground and so I asked for a lawyer. The police officer who was questioning me kept talking to me and ended up getting a confession out of me. All the evidence they had against me was circumstantial and they needed my confession to prove my roll. Thank God the cop was recording the conversation. I filed a motion to suppress my confession on the grounds that I asked for a lawyer and the questioning did not stop nor was a lawyer provided to me. The judge ended up throwing out the whole case due to lack of evidence and all charges were dismissed. I would not recommend this to anyone. I did have a friend who was a lawyer so he did give me a little advice on how to go about things, but I was very lucky the case was out right dismissed. I was young and feeling a little powerful at the time. It's kind of scary too.

[–]remarkless 1 point2 points ago

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I'm not a lawyer but I've successfully represented my company on the prosecution side.

It was uneventful

[–]digitalmofo 1 point2 points ago

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My friend got a speeding ticket. He was driving a 2000 Chevy Cavalier, gold in color, 2 door. His ticket said that he was in a red 4 door 2003 Cavalier, so he took pictures of his car and everything. Judge said it didn't matter, found him guilty. Appeals judge was the same judge, so he didn't bother.

[–]Mortifer 1 point2 points ago

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I defended myself successfully in traffic court (Independence, MO). There was no evidence presented on either side other than my testimony versus the policewoman's testimony. The judge asked me for my defense against the charges of "failing to yield the right of way", and my response was "Police testimony is no more proof of my guilt than my testimony is proof of my innocense. Her testimony should not carry more weight than my own. So, I would argue that there is no proof of my guilt." The judge agreed.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points ago*

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I've won a few times in Small claims and I won a $1K FDCPA case against a scumbag collection agency but nothing special.

My favorite case was having to fire an attorney who wasn't getting shit done on my divorce and then winning my retainer back in small claims court. I felt like a fucking Boss when the judge ruled in my favor :)

[–]InfallibleBiship 1 point2 points ago

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I'm sure you're all bored with beating traffic tickets, but that's what I'm gonna add to here, but I'll be brief.

One traffic ticket I got had the wrong date on it. When I went in to fight it, the magistrate said, "That's the only thing you could have said that would have made me dismiss this ticket." So it was dismissed, and the cop was rather embarrassed.

[–]Doctorlastname 1 point2 points ago

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Ok, so this was the summer between my junior and senior years of high school. I was going to pick up my sister from her middle school cheerleading practice. Road crews were working at a pretty pivotal intersection between my house and the school, so the stoplight were turned off. Therefore, everyone was supposed to act like a four way stop and all. Well, as I was waiting to go, I saw two cars go out of turn. In taking my sister back, I decided to go a different route to avoid the traffic, figuring that I would end up going out of turn and causing some major accident.

So, I'm driving down this other road. I live in a rural area, so there was houses on one side of the road and a cornfield on the other side. All of a sudden, I see a cop behind me. I pull over and he does too. I can't figure out why he would have pulled over behind me because I wasn't doing anything wrong. He comes by, tells me I was speeding, which was a shock to me. He asks me what I thought the speed limit was here. I say 45 mph. He says the speed limit is 30 mph hour in town. I'm shocked because I'm pulled over five feet from a cornfield, there's no way this is considered in town. Likewise, I was going 46 mph. So, I end up going home with a speed ticket.

As it turns out, the speed limit sign there was posted on the left side of the road, voiding it and because the houses were just far enough apart on the one side, it was legally a rural area and the speed limit should have actually been 55 mph. So, naturally, I take it to court.

I don't actually get a court date until November. You see, my mother works in the prosecutor's office, so they had to call in a special prosecutor and a special judge, costing the county thousands of dollars over a speeding ticket. I get there and the special prosecutor offers to drop my charge to just a seat belt violation. I tell him no.

Clearly the prosecutor wasn't planning on this. The cop wasn't there, so he had to call him in to testify. He had gotten a map of the area off of Google Maps. I, on the other hand, had gotten a satellite image from a zoning office and taken pictures of the area. I knew the laws, the special prosecutor (who usually dealt with big cases like rapes, murders, and drug rings) had to look up speeding ticket laws on the fly. The judge was clearly favoring me during this whole ordeal. However, I couldn't really argue that a speed limit sign I had passed earlier on the road didn't apply to me, so I was found guilty (therefore, I guess I didn't really "successfully defended myself").

Usually, speeding limit violations are $75. The judge fined me $1 and I had to pay court costs, which totaled an additional $100. I also got 30 days of court supervision, which is unusual. It's usually 90.

After the trial, the cop admitted to the judge that he had seen this same case come through three times before and all three times, it's been the same outcome. The judge wasn't too happy to hear that and told the cop off.

Later that day, I found out that road was technically a county road and the cop, being a city cop, didn't have any jurisdiction on that road and had I done that research, I could have gotten the case dismissed.

Anyways, a little while later, someone from the Department of Transportation came in to talk to my mom about the case. As it turns out, the judge notified some people about this. The county ended up re-signing the entire road, both ways, to ensure that something like this would never happen again. And the city police were barred from ticketing on that road.

Tl;Dr: Got ticketed for speeding, found out cop couldn't have legally ticketed me, went to court, was found guilty and paid $101 but caused the county to spend thousands of dollars in fixing the road.

[–]galinmd 1 point2 points ago

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I didn't have to go to court...but I sued the TSA for dropping my laptop and breaking it at an airport security checkpoint. They denied any and all responsibility and/or liability.

Details: Put my luggage on the x-ray scanner and walked through the metal detector and was told to step into a special glass enclosure to await additional screening. The TSA agent took my luggage and laptop (in that grey bin) and placed it on the counter for the special screening...with the laptop on the top of this little tower of luggage, only half-way...so I got to watch it fall to the ground as soon as she let go of it. (I couldn't stop it, I was behind that glass enclosure and just imagined getting teased if I tried to leave the box and rush to my belongings...like I was trying to hide something). Filed a normal claim, was promptly denied (not their fault). Their rejection letter basically said, "It's not our fault and if you want to appeal you have to sue us in District Court". So I did. I went to the District court and filed the lawsuit myself. They settled and made it clear...they didn't settle cause they were admitting fault, just to avoid further litigation costs. So technically I didn't "Win". Let's just say I have a fully functioning laptop again.

TL;DR - TSA dropped my laptop, they settled out of court for the damages.

[–]TLoblaw 1 point2 points ago

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At 16, I got a traffic violation for exiting my lane of traffic into the shoulder dismissed after the officer testified and I asked for a judgment of acquittal before I was to give any testimony. What the officer described I did - even if 100% true (and he was about 95% truthful in my opinion) - was not actually a violation of the statute he cited me for (which very clearly required exiting my lane into a lane of oncoming traffic, not the shoulder). The judge agreed, dismissed and gave the officer a lecture about reading his code book before wasting mine and the court's time with false accusations. So, so satisfying. . . . Now, as a prosecutor, I try quite hard to pay close attention to cases and avoid instantly deferring to police officers.

[–]reaverdude 1 point2 points ago

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A majority of these are all traffic stories. Has anyone ever successfully defended themselves in family court?

[–]CloneDeath 1 point2 points ago

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I once ran a stop sign without slowing down or looking. I was on my bike. I got a ticket. I was only 14 or 15. Anyways, completely shocked, I give it to my parents, and we go to court. I plea guilty. She (the Judge) asks for my license, I say I don't have one. "Driving through a stop sign AND without a license??" I told her I was on my bike. She looks shocked, and reads the tickets, literally laughs out loud, and shouts "Innocent!".

I only had to pay a $20 court fine and was declared innocent after admitting guilt.

[–]silvab 2 points3 points ago

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I'll throw my story into the hat, though it probably won't be read.

I was driving home from Miami to Gainesville, which essentially covers the stretch of the state of Florida. It's Christmas night 2010, and the drive takes about 5 hours give or take. I'm about 1 hour away from getting home, and I always keep cruise control 9 miles over the speed limit. I also have a radar detector. The turnpike highway that runs across the state is fairly straight and extremely dull to drive. I had left a rest top to do the last stretch home, and I got a phone call. To sum up the prologue story, I was doing 90 on the dot when I was clocked. I hit my brakes too late and he pulled me over. Gave me the ticket, merry christmas.

So I contested the ticket, drove 1.5 hours to the court house. Waited another hour in court, went up and the judge asks if I want to contest the ticket. I say yes. We'll mail you a court date. What? K Fine.

2 months later, I went back to court. I had driven the same stretch of road on the way to court and filmed it on my ipad. I realized there was an overpass right before I was clocked. I tried to say that I was going downhill and that the reflection from the bridge interfered.

The judge didn't bite. The cop walked up and said that he had been on the force for 40 years and had clocked over 15,000 tickets. O_o

I know it's not the ending you were expecting, but the moral of my story is different. Sometimes it's worth just paying a ticket! I got forced to do an in-person driving course (instead of online) in addition to court fees and the ticket cost.

D'oh

[–]Glarfugus 1 point2 points ago

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Reddit.

[–]In_The_Wrong 10 points11 points ago*

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I think this one might be a winner. I was at the end of a 9 day canoe trip with my brother on the Colorado River.

We had been camping with almost no food. If we did not catch fish we did not eat. We had a stringer with 3 large fish on tied up just off shore. We were on our way back to our camp spot when I saw a coyote trying to get to our fish. I grabbed my 22. The only gun I had and fired off a warning shot to scare it away. Then I fired off 10 more rounds for the fun of it.

What I did not know is that I was on a National Park. Two L.E.O. were called out by someone on a houseboat about 500 yards away. They hiked in 2 miles to were we were, right around dusk and snuck to within about 60 yards from us. They both pop up, pointed their M16’s at us and yell: “Park Rangers hands on your heads”. They said it too fast so I kindly asked them to slow down and enunciate. This did not amuse. They again screamed for me to put my hands on my head. I told them to calm down and stop pointing M16’s at two unarmed campers. Again not amused. They kept screaming at us as they walked the last 60 yards. (I never put my hands on my head) One kept his assault rifle pointed at us while the other violated every one of our constitutional rights.
After almost three hours of them illegally searching everything we had. They found my gun in its case and a small pipe. They charged me with possession of a firearm in a National Park. (which is now legal. Thanks Obama!) Discharging a firearm in a National park And possession of drug paraphernalia. It did not help that I was talking shit the whole time. I showed up to court in a suit, clean cut and with a stack of supporting case material. In court there is some law that witnesses cannot hear each other’s testimony, so I asked the officer’s to step out. The prosecution said they were not calling them as witnesses, so I said I was. They had to sit out side; they were bummed. When I did call them I only asked them one question. I just wanted to fuck with them.

The SCOTUS had just ruled (like a week earlier) that in order to be convicted of a drug offence the lab tec that did the test must be there to testify. The prosecution did not know that. So I got the pipe lab results suppressed. There was no one to testify that I shot the gun, and when they asked me if I had, I said no. Throughout the trial I had shown that the cop was lying. He said the gun was not in a case, it was, they had it. He said there were shells on the ground that he didn’t pick up and submit into evidence. There were not. (I pick up all my brass so they were in my pocket.) So I asked why he didn’t find it relevant to collect the ones on the beach. He did not have an answer. He said that his dispatch sent him out on a call that there were 2 men with a gun and a canoe. I had the dispatch report and all it said was someone heard shots. That’s it. His report did not match up to his testimony. The trial went on for four hrs. The judge didn’t give a ruling right then. He said he wanted to review some of the evidence. But it was obvious I made them look like the liars they were. They all knew they lost the case. Bad. One month later I received a letter from the court the judge said he felt the officers were being dishonest. He found me not guilty on all charges.

The sergeant called me after he received the judge’s decision and apologized for the actions of the officers and informed me that they would no longer be working for the forest service, or any L.E. It felt great they were such dicks to me and the whole time I was on the beach I was telling them that when this goes to court they are going to get fucked. And they did! BTW: I really was guilty of all charges. But they couldn’t prove it.

TL;DR: Smart ass L.E.O were dicks. I not only got off, but I got them fired.

Edit: The only law I broke was discharging a firearm, in a National park. I did not know I was in a National park. There were no signs, nothing to let me know I had entered one. It did not say I was in a National park on my map. It was the middle of nowhere. The nearest road was 2 miles away. The pipe was found with rolling papers and smoking tobacco. Not weed! My brother was smoking out of it. It was not mine but I was the one with the big mouth so I got the ticket. It had been use for weed before. But they never would have found it if they had not violated my 4th Amendment. The cops left the tobacco out of the report.

I got everything suppressed and them fired because they violated several of my constitutional rights. That is the way all our rights are enforced if a L.E.O. violates them the information he/she obtains by doing so is suppressed in court.

Edit #2: 1) If you're mad someone who was technically guilty got off. You should be mad at the officers. They are the reason for the not guilty. 2) If you're mad they got fired, then you should be mad at them, not me. They brought this upon themselves. If they were honest and did not violate The Constitution Of The United States Of AMERICA they would still have their job.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points ago

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Now I can't tell if the system works or not.

breaks law

lies in court

gets off Scot free

bonus round: arresting officers lose jobs

[–]hyperkinetic 1 point2 points ago

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If those officers hadn't broken the law and did everything by the book, he'd have been boned. I say the system works.

[–]In_The_Wrong 1 point2 points ago*

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The system doesn't work. The reason for that is L.E.O. lie and violate constitutional rights. They were caught this time but only because I know my shit. The only law I broke was discharging a firearm in a National park. I did not know I was in a National park. There were no signs, nothing to let me know I had entered one. It did not say I was in a National park on my map.

I got everything suppressed and them fired because they violated several of my constitutional rights. That is the way all our rights are enforced if a L.E.O. violates them the information he/she obtains by doing so is suppressed in court.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago*

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You were a shithead and you're mad at cops that did their job? You're out in the woods firing off rounds and are pissed that cops pointed their guns at you telling you to put your hands on your head? Then brag that you wouldn't comply? THEN you get two cops fired because you fucked up and refused to deal with the consequences.

Jesus christ, if you continue to get upvoted... I just don't know what the fuck to think of this community anymore. Endangering the lives of everyone near you isn't cool.

[–]hyperkinetic 9 points10 points ago

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you're mad at cops that did their job?

By the sound of it, the cops didn't do their job.

Endangering the lives of everyone near you isn't cool.

You've obviously never gone camping on the Colorado River. The fact that there was anyone close enough to hear/report him is remarkable. It's not like he was firing randomly in the middle of Central Park.

[–]Pontus518 1 point2 points ago

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If this gets enough upvotes, you should be able to get Matt Damon in here. He did it loads of times back when he was a janitor at MIT.

[–]nuggetboy 1 point2 points ago

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MAHH DAYMAHHHHH!

[–]nomofica 1 point2 points ago

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I didn't defend myself, but a person I took to court for assault did defend himself. Guy was a drunk bigot who would have outbursts in the courtroom. He also tried to claim I put him in a headlock - I'm 5'8"-ish, and he's at least 6'5". I wouldn't even be able to reach around his neck if I tried. Needless to say he lost.

[–]NeverReadMyHistory 1 point2 points ago

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There was a story out of Texas awhile back where a young man defended himself against a dwi. The cop left the beer in the patrol car in the back seat with him handcuffed. He managed to somehow drink the rest of the beer while waiting in the backseat while the cop was in the station doing the pre entry stuff. He argued, that since they breathalized him at the station AFTER he drank the beers, they could not prove he was drunk while driving. He won the case. He said he had the beers because he was nervous.

[–]hdcantona 1 point2 points ago

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upvoting this, would be good to read

[–]Mrubuto 0 points1 point ago

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I successfully defended my self out of several traffic violations(all the same incident). the cop showed up too, we both plead are case and I even drew pictures on a white board. but, I don't think this is what you mean.

[–]qwop88 0 points1 point ago

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Define "court".

I defended myself from an undersage drinking and trespassing charge, but it was just in front of a magistrate. No jury and whatnot.

[–]idefiler6 2 points3 points ago

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That counts as "court". Small shit like that does not require a jury. Magistrate =/= judge in this situation.

[–]asmodeanreborn 0 points1 point ago

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Two of my best friends tried defending themselves in court in Sweden on the basis that the charges were absolutely ridiculous (and rightfully so). They lost the case badly and ended up getting fined.

[–]USAFPilot 0 points1 point ago

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One time I defended myself in court successfully against a Traffic ticket. The cop didn't show, so I won! True Story.

[–]Lennobowski 0 points1 point ago

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That janitor at MIT

[–]rougepenguin 0 points1 point ago

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My dad works as a pollster for (mostly) state-level elections. I remember asking him about this and he told me he's defended himself I think four times and won three of those. To be fair though, he went to law school for a while and didn't feel like sticking with it. You want me to see if he'll do it?

[–]ImTellin 0 points1 point ago

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I beat a red light ticket representing myself. It isn't all that impressive though; they asked up front what my profession was and I think they chickened out and made the office unavailable as a witness. They dismissed it.

They made me wait until the last slot of all the red light ticket fighters that day too.

[–]donac 0 points1 point ago

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I did/filed all the legal paperwork and also represented myself in my divorce hearing in MN. It went well, but is not nearly as exciting as some of these other stories.

[–]TryingToSucceed 0 points1 point ago

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My mother successfully defended herself after getting ticketed for running a stop sign.

The story is pretty boring however, but the prosecutor who intimidated her can suck it.

[–]kaleidoughscope 0 points1 point ago

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A judge?

[–]valetudo020 0 points1 point ago

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I've lost to a pro se (unrepresented) defendant in a trial as a student attorney working as a prosecutor. Pro Se defendants win all the time. It's not that big of a deal. Lawyers can't fabricate the truth.

[–]forgotmypassword169 0 points1 point ago

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1) I had two traffic tickets. 2) Yep. 3) Yep. Especially one of those X-copper traffic ticket guys 4) Minor traffic infractions 5) Depends on how much balls you have.

First thing I did was ask for disclosure. Up here, if you ask, the officers have to provide you with any evidence they plan to use to argue their case against you. Cop A didn't provide disclosure, so the case was thrown out immediately. Cop B's disclosure was illegible, and eventually they dropped those charges as well.

Traffic Tickets are simply a revenue stream, and you often have little to lose by fighting them. At worst, you'll probably pay it, usually, you'll get a reduction and best case, it gets dropped.

As an ROI equation (from their viewpoint), it also makes sense for you to fight it. As long as you can make it more costly for them to keep pursuing you, it's in their interest to just collect from those who don't fight back.

Also, from what I understand, up here a Crown Attorney has a record. A win (paying full price) counts as a win. A deal (reduced charge/fine) also counts as a fine. It they withdraw charges, it doesn't count at all. and If they lose (as in, it goes to a trial and they lose the case), it counts as a loss. Their record is very important to their reputation, so chances are, unless they're without-a-doubt-sure they can win, they're not going to risk it for a minor traffic infraction.

Of course, I'm no lawyer, this is all information I've cobbled around from the internet, so don't take my advice. I'm not a legal advisor of any kind.

Also, if you are guilty, then be honest, pay your fine and learn your lesson. I maintain that did not commit those infractions and that's why I fought them.

[–]thirdhistorian 0 points1 point ago

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This Maryland nurse defended herself successfully against the IRS in tax court and won her deduction.

[–]MondayMonkey1 0 points1 point ago

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My bro fought in court 4 times over speeding tickets, won every one of them.

One of them was a constitutional question (habeus corpus).

It may not be a huge trial, but he definitely did a fuck ton of paper work (he was charged with excessive speeding once, and then 4 months later another 3 times within 10 days, if he had lost even one, he would have gotten his car impounded for at least a month).

[–]selkie_3 0 points1 point ago

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Ira Glass on This American Life did a show addressing this, and discussed a man who successfully defended himself. The episode is called Pro Se. Listen to it.

[–]pabloe168 0 points1 point ago

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Would my mom count? She was sued for "attempt of murder" because she got in to a road rage argument in the street with an 19 year old who attempted to take her car keys, attack her and my brothers from outside the car, smashed the car and then proceed to step on the hood of the car. She then moved forward 10 meters which supposedly were 150 that's when "he has terribly endangered" she stopped.We got sued. The day at the court the lawyer did not showed up and she went ahead and represented herself. Btw this in Colombia. Works?

[–]pixelharmony 0 points1 point ago

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My friend got ticketed for speeding, but was poor and didn't want to pay for it so he decided the go to court. The officer was pacing the driving to take the speed, during trial he asked to officer "when was the last time your vehicle's speedometer was calibrated"? Officer could not answer and charges were dropped.

[–]sczmbz 0 points1 point ago

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My mom has successfully beaten tax evasion charges twice from the IRS without a lawyer. She scares the shit out of people that don't really know her.

[–]mr-mistoffelees 0 points1 point ago

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I'm in the UK and have done this successfully twice - what you'd term as a minor traffic offence, namely speeding. In each case, I read up on what I'd be arguing and in each instance, "got off on a technicality". That is to say, my argument won (as I was arguing a technicality).

I was also awarded costs. In the UK system, if you're found not guilty then the prosecuting side can be made to pay any reasonable costs you've incurred. I usually put in for £90 each time.

So, to answer your questions: 1) Speeding (*3) 2) Yes, absolutely. Also make sure you know court procedures - when to talk, when not to and so on. 3) No, they didn't. 4) See above - not guilty for each one. 5) It depends. Not for something big and complex, but if it's something where it doesn't matter that much, knock yourself out. At worst I'd have had a £100-ish fine and three points on my licence (12 means you get it taken away).

[–]Mothman21 0 points1 point ago

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Check this out.

[–]wonderwoman888 0 points1 point ago

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TIT (too long didn't type): Someone was suing me last year for $15000. They were from the USA and I was in Canada. I never showed up for court, never hired a lawyer and the judge ended up siding with me.