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[offer] I will psychoanalyze a text for you. (self.Favors)
submitted 1 year ago* by [deleted]
[deleted]
[–]kleinbl00 20 points21 points22 points 1 year ago*
Hmmm. This should be interesting. There are reasons for all of these.
1) Wordsauce on old people
2) Saydrah on feminism
3) unattributed attack throwaway on Karmanaut
4) A loveletter from a stalker that shall remain nameless
5) Because those who live in glass houses should not cast stones
EDIT: And a little sumpin' sumpin' for good measure, a dose of the most enigmatic troll in Reddit history.
[–][deleted] 1 year ago*
[–]LGBTerrific 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago
Third link had a typo
[–]kleinbl00 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago
Oops. Fix'd.
[–]AtheismFTW 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago
What does his reflection have to do with losing in Zelda?
[–]agscala 6 points7 points8 points 1 year ago
You gotta admit, that joke was a bit of a stretch...
[–]cyberjet189 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago
Good effort though.
[–]Poromenos 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago
What do you mean, "there are reasons"? Also, the last guy doesn't sound like a troll, he's very reasonable.
[–]kleinbl00 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago
Because in all of the above, I know more than I'm admitting (with the exception of my own - I lie poorly which is one reason I avoid doing it). And the last girl sometimes forgot which account they were logged into.
[–]Poromenos 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago*
I see, thanks.
EDIT: Bah, now I'm going crazy trying to solve the underlying riddle, even though there isn't any.
[–]NadsatBrat 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago
She slipped up a lot with keeping her story straight (e.g. age changes, changes from being a Seventh Day Adventist to Catholic, etc). Every time I or someone else noted the slip-ups she deleted them. In other words, 'successful troll was successful'.
Ah, right, I did notice a few deletions but didn't see anyone calling her out on it (I didn't read the entire thing, though). Thanks for the info!
[–][deleted] 1 year ago
When I posted, he'd gotten zero.
Also, mine are some of the few that are public.
In short, I was first and I'm doing this for the general amusement of the rest of the world.
Go disapprove somewhere else.
[–]JeepChick 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago
Does your offer stand for emails too or am I misreading this?
[–]JeepChick 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago
May I PM / send it to you? And might I ask, if English isn't a first language will that matter?
[–]JeepChick 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago
Sent. :)
[–]drf24 12 points13 points14 points 1 year ago
So, by telling us you have a PhD in psycholinguistics, you admit that you are unqualified to do this.
[–]drf24 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago
But you do not have clinical certification in psychoanalysis?
Sorry, I don't mean to be a dick, but psychoanalysis is serious stuff, and you could end up misleading a lot of people. I know I'm not being that nice, and I know you are going through a tough time, so I don't want you to feel bad about it, I just worry about all the other people you could affect.
[–]multivoxmuse 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago
BTW is it on purpose that your username when unjumbled reads StoryTeller?
[–]sli 12 points13 points14 points 1 year ago
Disclaimer: For novelty purposes only.
[–]Poromenos -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago
So are you going to answer anything? You've only done one and it's been a day.
Ah, I thought you might be answering privately. I just think that more people will be interested/intrigued by the analyses if you try the public ones first...
Isn't psychoanalysis pretty broad in itself?
It seems to me that in common usage, outside of a professional environment, psychoanalysis could simply refer to studying and explaining the way a person thinks - their motives, goals, etc. In this case, TreyStroller could explain the way someone thinks based on the words they write. With a linguistics background, particularly in semantics and pragmatics, a lot can be determined by the manner of things written, the words used, and what they most likely mean given the context of the document.
This also isn't a professional environment - it's an online discussion. Sli summarized it well: it's for novelty purposes only.
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago
Can it be a work of fiction?
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago
Gerald now regrets getting Yosome involved in the effort to put supplies away. Yosome made sure everything was in it's proper place... But that meant building an entirely new shelfing unit. The standard one was inadequate. Actually, most everything here is inadequate. The house is small, but seems decently ventilated. It's heated by a cast iron stove that Yosome will probably get burned on at some time. It's one room, except the toilet. There is no bath. Yosome is concerned by this and the fact that there is a huge basin in the corner of the room near the water pump. It appears baths have to be taken in the middle of the room, standing in the basin. Not fun..The door is at one end of the shack and the beds at the end farthest from the door. The beds are smallish and of no standard size. Somewhere between full and twin. There seems to be plenty of blankets, but no pillows. Yosome wishes he had offered more in bribe to the steward on the plane... It didn't seem to matter that Yosome offered money, they didn't want him to take their pillow. But it was so perfect. Yosome will forever mourn the not obtaining of that pillow. Gerald had been embarrassed by Yosome's behavior. Axel wouldn't have been.
Oh yeah, the room. The floor is plain stone and the walls are bare, but don't leak. The house is covered with some kind of shiny stuff and the roof is really steep to let the slow slide off. A fire was started using wood from the huge pile of wood covered in the huger tarp outside. Yosome will take his coat off when Gerald stops opening the door and lets the heat build up.
The home itself has no electricity save for a small shed outside that has a generator. Yosome had to show Gerald how to use the antiquated radio transmitter. It's a clever machine. As I was sending the confirmation of arrival to Control, Yosome studied the plans to it. It disguises itself as shortwave and transmits a beeping noise, in reality the beeping noise signals a satellite and six times a minute the messages are transmitted. The machine itself was very advanced in it's time, perhaps mid 1980s... UVB-76 is it's call-sign.
Yosome wonders sometimes as he writes if these will ever be read... If they are it means Yosome has been marked for execution and might be dead. Isn't that something? Maybe not though, could be alive. It's hard to say. Gotta go, Gerald is all freaked out about the machine. Apparently it's doing something.
Control replied, apparently arrival was just on time and there is a job scheduled for tomorrow. Apparently they had meant to contact Gerald and tell him to stay in St. Petersburg for the night... That didn't happen so tomorrow Gerald and Yosome have to make the trek back to the city... 315 km.Gerald also sent in his transfer request, reasons included his being a security risk (“My dashing good looks and exotic charm catch the eye of the people here, drawing dangerous amount of attention to me and my partner.”) and his aversion to the cold (“It literally disappeared inside me when I stepped outside”).
Tell me what that tells you. =D thanks.
[–]evrythingallthetime 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago
Can I PM you a letter(handwritten) I wrote to my recent ex? I can type it out, or send you the pictures I took of it before I gave the letter to her.
[–]evrythingallthetime 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago*
Yeah no problem. I wasn't sure If you had dabbled in graphology or not. Its sweet stuff. I'll PM it as soon as I finish typing it.
EDIT: PM'd!
[–]evrythingallthetime 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
Did you ever get a chance to check out that letter I pm'd to you? Id love it if you were able to check it out sometime.
[–]Kaphix 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago
Nice try somebody's ex girlfriend.
[–]Purple_Antwerp 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago
How much text do you need? I have some emails I want analyzed!
[–]calmlb 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago
I'm also a Ph.D. in Psycholinguistics. Perhaps in your favour, I don't have the nerve to attempt what you're trying to do.
However, after reading the last half of your original post (i.e., the edit) may I suggest you put your talents in semantics (my main area of study) to use to help those in the semantic neighbourhood camp?
The number of people who view specific effects that I've seen as due simply to word frequency and other artifacts of the english language is annoying.
It's nice to see there are a few psycholinguists on reddit. Linguistics, in general, is one of my main interests- add to that the mysteries of the mind makes psycholinguistics a very interesting field.
[–]calmlb 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
LGBTerrific: llove your handle btw. I no longer work in academia, I actually teach yoga full-time and own/run a studio here in BC.
Actually, yoga's not far off at all from psycholinguistics and other "mysteries" of mind.
[–]ENRICOs 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago
As an aside. I noted that you mentioned that you're presently having substance abuse problems.
I noticed your use of standard twelve step terminology:
"I've already relapsed once this year, erasing months of progress."
"I almost got high the other night too."
As someone who is a former long term heroin addict, and a present day licensed health-care professional who works in the field of addiction from a non-12-step, evidence based perspective. I'd like to know if you've psychoanalyzed The Big Book, 12 Steps & 12 Traditions, or any other related works.
I'd also like to know what particular substances you choose to abuse.
Please feel free to PM me and we can have a private discussion if you'd like to.
I'd be very interested in talking with you.
[–]zombiecake 7 points8 points9 points 1 year ago
This is a message from an ex-girlfriend that i received on Facebook. I don't intend on responding but thought it would be interesting to see what you had to say about it.
"So, it took me a really long time to decide whether or not to send this to you. And as I sit here, I still don't know whether or not I'm going to have the balls to hit the send button. We'll see.
It's been about a year since I effectively removed all memory of what it was like being with you. I remember last december, I had a dream about you, and being frightened at the sound of your voice. Or the memory of the sound of your voice. Or more likely the memory of you at all.
I know you're sitting there, thinking why did she send this, if you even bother to read it at all. I don't know. I don't remember a lot. But I did remember there was that summer, the Marti summer, before you came back and everything got fucked up all over again, that we had an unbelievable correspondence. I just re read it. I doubt you even still have it around. It's heartwarming. We didn't always hate each other.
I don't hate you now. I don't even talk about you anymore.
I think about you when I drive down kurtz avenue, and when I hear LCD Sound system, and whenever I see someone with strawberry-dyed lips. But it's all so fleeting. Like a dream I had, that slowly slips away from me the more awake I become. Trite, and unworthy of your great intellect as I always was, it doesn't make it any less true for me.
I guess that's all I had to say. I don't think I'll know anymore unless I hear from you again.
Tell Brian I miss him. Sincerely.
I miss you too. I think that's what I really had to say this whole time."
[–]LincolnHighwater 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago
I'm sort of drunk, don't know the backstory and do not wish to infringe unduly, but I feel compelled to urge you to consider responding in kind.
Meh, I got bad news today and redemption always makes me feel better. Forgive me if I overstep or offend.
Cognac.
I'm not intoxicated and I once responded to an email from an ex-ex-girlfriend (I broke up with her)... best decision of my life. I don't really understand the context or anything, but sometimes it can help, even if not to the extent it helped me.
[–]ANTI-PUGSLY -24 points-23 points-22 points 1 year ago
lol u gay bro
[–]Forb 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago
I'm tempted to send you to a link of my dream journal. Not for dream interpretations, but what they mean to me. I write my dreams as soon as I wake up, without even moving, I sleep with my notebook next to my face.
[–]gabbehh 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago
Tell us about your education. Why/how did you go into it? How has it changed your life? Do you read people easily? and any other question you may think I am interested to hear the answer of
I don't have anything right now to send, but I am interested in your process- what you look for, how you would try to interpret certain things, etc. I know it'd take years of studying to adequately be able to do this, but could you offer a short summary, maybe a list of 2-3 things you'd look at when reading and analyzing a text?
[–]ninjafoo 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago
this is a pretty damned interesting thread. i don't have anything for you, treystoller, but good luck! i'm very interested in psychoanalysis, so i'll just be a lurker. =)
oh and i hope everything works out for you. truly.
[–]wildncrazyguy 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
I may write a book one day regarding my exploits, if you get some time, could you look at these posts and give me a bit of feedback? There are two stories here:
http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/de5nj/reddit_have_you_have_ever_done_something_just_for/c0zjyg6?context=3
Much appreciated, I hope this helps both of us :)
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
What about a journal entry? Would you be interested in analyzing something like that?
Also, just wanted to say that you picked a really cool thing to specialize in. I almost minored in linguistics but switched to journalism because I thought it'd get me a better job. Incidentally, I now make pizza for a near-living.
[–]ganelo 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
Just out of curiosity, how about something like http://www.kuro5hin.org/prime-intellect/mopi1.html ? It claims it's a novel, but in reality it's 8 chapters each the length of that first one. In particular I'm curious about the change in the author over the course of the "novel", as it starts getting a lot less dark after the first chapter or two.
[–]tess_elation 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago
Commenting to save. I'd be interested in the response to this too.
[–]punkypoet 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
Huh. If you can tell what's been speedily written, I'd love to see you look at my blog (I review books). http://bibliofreakblog.com. I wonder what I'm saying about myself in what I say about books.
[–]redcitykiss 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
Interesting...
I'd love to hear what you make of this:
http://www.reddit.com/r/writing/comments/dedt0/could_i_get_some_critiques_on_this_short_piece/
[–]burnstyle 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
i would lov for you to take a crack at this: http://www.burnstyle.net/2010/06/youve-got-mail/
[–]cwm44 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
How about my profile on a kinky social networking site? I'm curious what someone who's studied these sort of things will make of me.
[–]nailz1000 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
Oh my god I have a story I wrote back in 2002 about the trix rabbit going insane and killing children with a nail gun. If I post it will you do your magic? PLEASE?
[–]canadianwriter 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
You might find these interesting:
http://www.theconfusedjournalist.com/2010/09/in-this-story-i-get-something-waxed-for.html
or
http://www.theconfusedjournalist.com/2010/08/red-carpet-tale_08.html
[–]MadAce 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
A while ago there was a thread where people were to psychoanalyze each other based on comments. I suggested myself but I was ignored.
So here's a comment thread of mine and I'd love you to tell me how far gone I am.
http://www.reddit.com/r/philosophy/comments/db9qd/dear_rphilosophy_its_not_a_joke_question_im/c0yz9ac
[–]smpx 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
Could you post the results of your analysis?
[–]miloir 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago
Can I bookmark this thread and PM you at some (much) later date if I ever need this sort of thing? Way cool.
You might not want to do this one (if so, I totally understand) but sex is so interesting.
Link (NSFW text - it's a longer one from r/gonewildstories)
Ninja edit: I'm using a throwaway so not everyone knows I read r/gonewildstories, hehe
[–]Poromenos 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago
If a woman were writing, why wouldn't she also refer to size, fellatio, etc etc? I'm not saying it's not a fantasy, but why can't it be a female one?
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago*
This is very entertaining. I lied above - I submitted the story because I wrote it (under an alt, of course). I wanted to know what you thought.
It is also entirely true, by the way - and I am a woman (no way to prove it obviously, but the incentive for me to lie about it is low). The events in the story happened at the end of July, when I was living in DC. The guy in the story introduced me to reddit, actually (hence the POV switch - I knew he would read the story).
I am what they call a 'power bottom' - someone who tends to be submissive in bed, but participates actively and vocally in sex. Hence the references to male anatomy, long description of oral sex, and obviously all the begging and spanking.
As for the 'thank you' trifecta: denying your true self leaves you empty, true. But when I have crazy, passionate sex I am able to truly be myself, and it makes me feel free, and very alive. I don't think I'm alone in this, am I?
Anyway, thank you for analyzing my post - it really was incredibly diverting!
Edit: you are entirely right in thinking that a cock-size obsession is mostly a male thing. In general, I couldn't care less about size. However, take it from someone with a vagina: once someone is so big as to have hurt you (which is actually referred to in the text), you remember. It means you're always a little bit nervous afterwards.
Edit 2: logged into the account I wrote the story under and posted here
[–]benpope -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago
I misread this as:
I will piss on a text for you.
What does that say about me?
[–]Gimli_The_Dwarf -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago
I'm sincerely intrigued that you can get anything meaningful out of 160 characters...
[–]GoldyOrNugget -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago
You remind me of Hannibal as depicted in Silence of the Lambs.
[–]scrodar -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago
Do this one, do this one!
http://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/dai0d/til_what_violentacrez_looks_like_nsfw/c0ytrxf
[–]scrodar -3 points-2 points-1 points 1 year ago*
TReystOLLER == violentacrez
This is just another waste of time troll thread. I can't believe that jackass has so much free time...
edit: Whoa... downmodded literally 23 seconds after making this comment. That pretty much proves it. If ya don't believe me, check out TReystOLLER's overview page.
all it takes is a username and password
create account
is it really that easy? only one way to find out...
already have an account and just want to login?
login
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